Pride

7

He looked away from me quickly, and my heart leapt into my throat. What if he said no and didn't want to look me in the eyes when he said it? Nolan was a nice, sweet guy who probably wasn't very good at saying no.

"Like...like a date?" His voice was so much quieter than I expected, and shook like he was nervous. Was this it? Was he trying to let me down easy?

"Yeah." I breathed out, and I saw his jaw clench, then unclench as he let out a sigh.

"I thought the whole school year was going to go by with us just barely being friends."

He was shaking his head slightly, talking almost to himself. And suddenly I couldn't stand not knowing any longer. I needed to know why he wouldn't look in my eyes, and why he wasn't giving me a straight answer.

"Are you upset? You don't have to go, you know." I said somewhat defensively.

"Upset?" He turned towards me, and I saw the tears in his eyes he was desperately trying to blink back. "God, no. Nothing like that." He looked down at his hands, smiling so big the corners of his eyes crinkled.

"I'm happy. So happy I don't know what to do with myself." He turned back to smile at me, and I felt my heart lift at the soft look in his eyes. I don't think I've ever been looked at quite like that. Like he was looking at the very source of his happiness.

"I've liked you all school year. That's why I kept trying to talk to you, why I became friends with Chris. I mean, I like him too, but I originally only talked to him to talk to you." I laughed, and if possible, his smile deepened. He tilted his head slightly to look at me, and I felt my cheeks heat up under his gaze.

"What?" I questioned as he continued to look at me.

"Your laugh is beautiful. Just like you."

"Stop, I don't like that word."

"Beautiful?" He looked confused, and I sighed.

"Yes. I don't like it. I'd rather be called handsome."

"Oh...is it because..." I couldn't figure out why his grin was getting bigger until he suddenly started singing at the top of his voice. "You don't know, oh oh! You don't know you're beautiful!"

"Nolan, stop! That song is awful."

"Not as awful as the idea of spending the whole summer away from you. You know that if I go to this parade with you, you aren't going to be able to get rid of me. I'll be attached to you all summer."

"That sounds great to me." A silence fell between us, not awkward, but I still wanted to be sure he actually wanted to go with me. He didn't exactly say yes.

"Nolan?"

"Hmm?" He hummed, looking into my eyes. I suddenly felt nervous again, like maybe if I asked a second time I'd get the answer I was originally expecting.

My hands began to shake, and I was fidgeting with the hem of my t-shirt. I stopped immediately when his hand covered mine.

"Don't be nervous. It's just me."

I took a deep breath, and looked up into his green eyes.

"So, will you come with me?"

"Of course! That's what I've been saying this whole time!"

I felt the sudden urge to lean forward and kiss him. Kiss him? Who am I kidding? He just agreed to go to the parade with me. Kissing was an entirely different matter.

Something in his eyes made me wonder what he was thinking as he continued to look at me. His eyes glanced down to my lips, and I felt my face heat up. I was probably blushing down to my toes. I've never been looked at like that. And it frightened me a little.

I stood up quickly, taking Nolan by surprise, but he was quick to follow my movements.

"Great! That's a little less than a week from now."

Nolan nodded, and I felt the silence begin to get awkward. It was like we both knew that the other had wanted us to kiss, but neither of us had made the first move. So now we just stood there, Nolan still looking happier than I'd ever seen him.

"So, are you going to bring a flag?" I asked him, to wade the tension, and my question seemed to do what I intended. Nolan stepped a little closer to me in his excitement to talk about what he was wearing to pride.

"Of course! I think I'm just going to wear it around my shoulders and do a white shirt or something. I'm pretty boring."

"Then we will kind of match. I was going to do that with my flag. What is your flag?"

"It's not the rainbow flag."

"I got that. What is it?" He smiled, and I could tell I wasn't going to get an answer from him today.

"I can't go telling you all my secrets in one day. A guy needs a little mystery about him when you ask him on a date. What about you? What's your flag?"

"Oh no. You don't tell me, I don't tell you."

"We can surprise each other then."

I nodded, just then realizing how close we were standing. With how close we were, I had to crane my neck back in order to see his face, but I didn't mind. It wasn't like I wanted to step back.

"You can't act like a stranger until Saturday." He warned, and with good reason. I was really good at avoiding him.

"Okay. You can sit by me in class."

"What about Chris?" Somehow my hand was in his again, and I loved how my much smaller hand felt in his.

"Chris can fend for himself." Nolan laughed, and I leaned against his shoulder, happy that it had all worked out and that he wanted to go with me.

"AHHH!!!! FINALLY!!" I pulled away from Nolan, surprised at Chris' voice so near us. He was standing a few feet away, a proud smile on his face. "I knew if I pushed him enough, he'd finally work up the nerve to talk to you."

Nolan smiled warmly at Chris, pulling my hand towards him so that I stepped back where I was before Chris interrupted us.

"Sorry, but it's like two minutes 'till class." Chris added apologetically, and I sighed.

Nolan kissed my forehead, and I could have melted in his arms if he wasn't already stepping away.

"C'mon, lets go, Lu." And he pulled me off to class, my hand held firmly in his.