A vision of Memoir

The man I shouldn't have

Hear me say this absolute despair.
Your embrace often cause me to hare.
This time is not the perfect time for you to care,
cause when I needed you, you said "I have no time to spare".

I was very young when I fell in love.
A man-made vase in a fragile state.
People said you held me up above,
but only few knew that you left me for other's sake.

I never complained about not having you by my side.
She don't even need to tell me your negativities which I knew, you cannot hide.
I am glad I was raised to fight,
and grew up to be not like you whose last sort is to flight.

Your touch matches a tear,
bearing questions in my mind that I don't want to hear.
Why now? Why not before?
Do I deserved to be here? Im not sure.

Before other people broke my heart,
There was a man who took away my every part.
The man who God gave to protect me,
was the man who shook my knowledge about what is family.

Every time you see me talking to a man,
arouses a feeling which you cannot shun.
You said you're a man and knows very well how man mind's work.
Why? Afraid that something will happen to me?

Don't worry dad.
With no hate, with no lies.
From the moment you hurt and left mom,
I knew very well what kind of man I shouldn't have.