𝙞𝙩 𝙪𝙨𝙚𝙙 𝙩𝙤 𝙗𝙚 𝙪𝙨 ⠑⠅⠙ 𝙠𝙞𝙢 𝙩𝙖𝙚𝙝𝙮𝙪𝙣𝙜

twenty nine

"What do I have to go to find out, Yoongs?" I caught him before he got into his car.

"Love me in exchange." He turned to me. "So that it will hurt less when I tell you."

"Yoongs, you know I cant." I hesitated to walk towards him.

"Then I won't tell you." He shook his head.

"Yoongs." I said.

"Dont Yoongs me." Yoongi pressed his lips. "It's not going to work."

"Fine, Yoongi." I crossed my arms. "Why won't you just tell me."

"Because I can't imagine how hard your life would be when you know the truth. Because I can't deal with you dealing with such pain. Because I care for you. Because I love you." He responded.

"If you love me, you would tell me!" I started shaking.

"I love you, so I'm protecting you!" Yoongi yelled back at me. He was shaking as well. But way more than me.

"Cut the bullshit!" I screamed. "I just want to know."

"Is my worry nothing to you?" He questioned. "Have you ever even considered my feelings?"

I didn't reply.

Yoongi took a long, deep sigh. "You know what, if you don't care. Then I shouldn't." He gulped. "Taehyung made you go through that because he hates you."

What?

"When Tae was diagnosed by Alzheimer's Disease, he was depressed. His attitude changed. He lost motivation and interest in almost everything he loved before. Including.. you. But he still stayed in a relationship. While you guys were hanging out, he realized that—that you were so happy.. and he wasn't. He was selfish. You were laughing while he was dying. You were breathing while he was suffocating. To him, it seemed like you had everything. He slowly grown to hate you. So ever since, he planned his death. He wanted you to suffer the most. Like I said, he made you go through all that because hates you."

I was shaking so hard. More than before. I wanted to break down right then and there, but I wanted to look tough in front of Yoongi. Soon enough, a tear ran down my cheek from my left eye. One tear eventually became many. I couldn't believe it. The one I love so much hates my guts to death.

"If you loved me.. w—why did you help him? Why didn't you stop?" I sniffled.

"Right.. I—" Yoongi stammered.

Flashback

"Hey, Yoongi Hyung." Taehyung said softly.

"Yeah?" Yoongi turned towards him.

"Promise you'll do anything I say? Since I'm.. d-d-d-dying?" He questioned.

"Promise." Yoongi said reassuringly.

"For real promise?" Taehyung repeated.

"Of course." Yoongi smiled slightly.

End of Flashback

"—I promised." Yoongi continued.

"You could've just..stopped." I said.

"The men of Bangtan don't abandon their promises." Yoongi said, feeling guilty. "No matter what. And Y/N.. he was dying."

"Well, tell your boss that.. his planned work." I started walking away. "I don't think I can live a normal life now. I should've listened to you, Yoongs. I was wrong. You were right. You and your boss win."

I literally want to fucking die.

Narrator's POV

Y/N walked back to her house. Her eyes were filled with tears. Committing suicide was definitely a thought. But for some reason, she still loved Taehyung. Like Y/N said before, "Even if you tell me the real, dark, hateful reason. I'll still in love with you. Because we're both fucked up".

Indeed they were. Along with Yoongi.

For Yoongi, the moment he started telling Y/N about the real truth, he felt like dying. When Y/N started walking away, he heart ached so much it actually hurt. He was definitely lying when he said he didn't care. Yoongi honestly cared for Y/N more than Taehyung ever did. But now Yoongi lost Y/N. He broke Y/N. It's quite weird. Y/N and Yoongi's sides of the story are so different. Yet they both learn the same thing.

It's always tough loving someone..

who doesn't love you back.