As Real as it Gets

Ricks Will be Ricks (Chapter 11, Part 2)

You were sitting on the couch, watching your favorite show to get your mind off of your boyfriend being in danger. The sound of a portal opening made you think Rick came back, but it sounded a little too distant, like it was outside the house. Suddenly, an alarm went off accompanied by flashing red lights and metal blast shields covered all the windows and doors.

Panicking, you stood up and looked around. The loud alarm calmed down and you were able to hear voices from the outside.

"Y/N, open up. It's me, Rick." You heard at the door.

You shook your head and walked over to it, "No, no. I know you're not my Rick, don't even try that shit with me."

He laughed, "Oh, you are in there! Good. You might wanna step away from the door."

"Fuck." You panicked even more and ran upstairs to hide. Getting into the bedroom, you locked the door and sat on the bed. Thoughts and fears rushed through your head while you took out your phone and called Rick.

-

The guards took your Rick's portal gun among other things. "You're not letting me leave, I'm guessing?" Rick raised an eyebrow at Morty.

Morty chuckled and stepped in front of the window, "Relax, enjoy the view while we wait for them to come back."

Rick's phone rang and he took it out of his coat, your name on screen, "Hello?"

"Rick! Oh my god, they're here and they're trying to get in! What do I do?" You were hyperventilating as the loud banging on the blast shields went on in the background.

Morty and everyone in the room with Rick looked at him and listened to what he was going to say, "It's okay, just calm down Bab- Jeff!"

You were very confused, "Who the fuck is Jeff? They're breaking in! Help me!"

"Listen, Jeff, I'm a little busy at the moment. I can't help you with your... leaky boiler."

"Rick, what are you talking abo- oh..." You thought, "They're listening to you, aren't they?"

"Yes, you're gonna have to call the plumber." Rick spoke, you heard in his voice that he was glad you got it.

Morty looked at him with narrow eyes, "Is it just me or is it a little suspicious that a guy named Jeff is calling you just as Ricks are breaking into your girlfriend's house?"

"Jeff is a sensitive soul who gets very upset when his... boiler... starts leaking, j- j- just let me finish this call." He hissed at Morty then turned his attention back to the phone, "Listen, if the boiler explodes... then uhh... you gotta take the wrench from the cupboard and screw the pipe so you don't flood the whole house."

You carefully listened, "Okay... cupboard. In the bathroom?"

"Yes."

The banging on the blast shields was still going strong, it make it known that they were still trying to get in. You made your way to the bathroom and in the cupboard was a gun. It looked very complicated and sci-fi. Luckily, you picked up a few things from Rick so you knew how to shoot. "Thank you, Rick. Take care, I love you."

"No problem, I'll see you soon." As Rick was about to hang up, another Rick took the phone from him and looked at the screen.

"It says Y/N and not Jeff, you lying sack of shit." The security Rick broke the phone in half.

-

The banging on the blast shields stopped and you hoped they had given up. A large explosion was then heard from downstairs, followed by many footsteps. You went back into the bedroom and locked the door, your heart racing faster than ever. They were heard opening doors and calling for you. Security robots activated and so screaming, banging and shooting was also heard from not too far away.

You stood there, frozen, waiting for them to knock down the door. Fewer footsteps moved on from the bottom floor, up the stairs and onto the second floor. The door handle on the bedroom door shook and turned, "She's in here." The lock was being carefully picked and a light clicking sound was heard. Slowly, the door was pushed open and a sight of three Ricks was revealed, "Hello there, Y/N."

"You didn't... you didn't knock down the door, I thought all the bad guys had a tendency of doing that." You said.

"That's just rude, why would we do that?"

You chuckled, "Oh it's rude to knock down a wooden door, but it's perfectly fine to blow up half of the first floor?"

They looked at each other then back at you, "You have a point."

You aimed and shot the first Rick in the chest, he collapsed to the ground. The other two raised their hands, "We're not supposed to harm you, so if you could just..."

"Too bad!" You shot the Rick on the right and the other one bolted out of the room and into the bathroom. You were taken aback by the cowardice and followed him, "What are you doing? Come out here and fight." you barked.

"I just... I really don't feel like it." He spoke quietly.

-

Rick stood with his arms crossed, "You'll never get to her."

"Is that so?" Morty asked, but his phone started ringing, "What is it? So what if she has a gun? She's just an old lady! Bring her here already!.... What? WHAT?! Everyone else is dead and you're hiding in the bathroom?! Fine... I'll send some more backup."

"Oh my god, I can't believe it." Rick laughed hysterically, "You guys are such a joke, it's incredible."

"Shut up!" Morty yelled.

-

You heard the Rick calling for backup. You shot the lock to enter the room and killed him, but it was too late. Another portal was heard downstairs with a lot more Ricks coming through.

You took a deep breath, "It's show time."

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