The Long Road To Home

Chapter 24: A little party

In the plane going to Stalingrad...

Alexei: Alright , that was the last wound, you shouldn't walk for a while , your foot doesn't looks good after all , it will remain a life scar but , whatever.

Bogdan: I need to see Kath...

Alexei: She is fine , you must stay here...

Bogdan: But...

Alexei: We found the dorm area of the plane , she felt asleep , you don't want to wake her up, ok ?

Bogdan: Indeed.

Sasha: Commrade Bogdan !

Bogdan: Yes , commrade Sasha !

Sasha (lifting a box): While I was looking for grenades I found this .

Bogdan: What is in "Pandora's Box" ?

Sasha (opens box): Et voíla , Goldessa Vodka and Stalinskaya , prewar vodka , older than my grandma if she was still alive.

Bogdan: We must wait for the others, we shall drink until we piss our pants .

Sasha: Haha , nice thinking .

Bogdan: More of a joke but guess we deserve a drink after all that.

Alexei: Pfft , deserve is a small word , my friend.

Ivan: Privyet , idiots , how's it going ?

Sasha: Ivan , what did I told you , damnit ?!

Ivan: A bit excited because we got out alive , plus we are going to Stalingrad and you remember how much I wanted too.

Sasha: About Stalingrad , who do we have to meet there ?

Bogdan: A colonel , his name is Andrey Harkov but forget that.

Alexei: Bogdan , I strongly require that you take right now small sips of vodka so the body temperature grows and fights the remain bacterias in your body .

Bogdan: Then we shall start, Sasha , make the shots .

Sasha: Vodka ?

Bogdan: No, 9 mm please , yes of course vodka , my friend.

Sasha (pouring vodka): Coming right up for the whole squad , commrade !

Bogdan (drinks shot): Ah, for the love of God , how old is this shit ?

Sasha: Older than my dead grandma , haven't I told you ?

Bogdan: How old was granny ?

Sasha: 68 when she died , if she would still be alive she would have 81 years old.

Bogdan: Jesus , that's why the vodka is so strong.

Alexei: Then consider it enough , my friend , wait a little and you'll be able to move .

Bogdan: Perfect, now , Sasha, would you mind telling us who Igor was ?

Sasha: My father's right hand.

Bogdan: And who is your father ?

Sasha (drinks votka shot): Vladimir Stalin .

Alexei (chockes on votka): WHAT ?!

Bogdan: Yeah , you didn't told me your father is Stalin ?

Sasha: Why do you think he was so tough with me , huh, well, you weren't supposed to know that since he wants me to be as silent as a KGB spy .

Bogdan: And why he kept you in so much poverty ?

Sasha: Why do you think ? To survived  the outside world.

Alexei :Woah woah woah , you are telling us right now that Vladimir Stalin, the man that survived all those battles ... is your papa that was throwing you into air when you were a little baby ?!

Sasha: Yeah , pretty much , is that a problem ?

Alexei: Holy shit , an descendent of a living legend sits at the table .

Sasha: Anyways , the guy worked with me for about 5 years and we became friends for a reason and now he is dead , the end.

Bogdan: Shocking to find out about your father. Anyways, I have to go...

Alexei: Sit down , one more minute .

Bogdan: Fine , can we do something ?

Sasha (pulling out a pack of cards): How about we make a table in the storage room, hmm ?

Bogdan: I can't move.

Sasha: Well shit . Thanks God we don't have to wait much longer 'til we get to Stalingrad.

Bogdan: At this point , I feel a little bit high from that votka .

Sasha: You will soon get the hang of it.

Alexei: Alright , you can leave.

Bogdan: Finally , for God sake .

Bogdan walks up to the dorm room and starts looking for Kath .

Kath(coming from his back and hugging him) : Peek a boo !

Bogdan (hugging her back): Oh, thanks God you're fine. Did you just woke up ?

Kath: I don't know, the first thing after boarding the plane was going to the bathroom and then leaving it , I don't exactly remember anything else.

Bogdan: You must've been really tired , anyways , now that you're here we can have some fun . Sasha found some vodka.

Kath : Oh... I'm not... into... alcohol.

Bogdan: If you say so, the thing is like 80 years old anyways , come on , we should meet with the guys .

They returned to the passenger room and saw Sasha making a little comedy show while holding the votka bottle like he was an ordinary alcoholic person.

Sasha : The next second I was looking at the guy inspecting my wounds and I told him , YOU'RE GAY ! The guy told me "Are you retarded , I'm trying to save your life !" And I was so drunk like I am now that I told him " I DON'T HAVE A PROBLEM WITH GAYS BUT WHEN YOU'RE A FAGGOT , THAT'S WHEN YOU'VE CROSSED THE LINE"

Alexei and Igor were dying from laughing .

Kath: How much did he drink ?

Bogdan: I don't know , before I left we both drank only one cup .

Kath: Who , you and Sasha ?

Bogdan: No, me and Alexei .

Sasha : And the guy SPITS O. MY WOUND THEN I START CURSING HIS MOTHER FOR MAKING HIM STUPID BECAUSE HE ISN'T ABLE TO DEAL WITH IDIOTS LIKE ME , AFTER ... after... I slowly wake up, and start screaming , I'M BLEEDING , DOES ANYONE WANTS TO HELP A DRUNK BOY THAT SMOKES GRASS FROM THE BACK OF HIS GARDEN PRETENDING HE'S SMOKING WEED ?!

Alexei (laughing): I CAN'T ... STOP, AH !

Ivan (laughing): Shut up, shut up, let's listen !

Sasha: AND I START REALISING THAT MY PANTS WERE WET AND IT WASN'T PISS ! APPARENTLY SOMEONE DRAGED ME INTO A POND AND LEFT ME TRY TO DROWN MY OWN SELF .

Ivan (grinning): Then what ?

Sasha: I see ... but what I see ?! A couple of exhausted rangers having mercy for me and dragging my drunk shit ass body out of the pond.

Alexei and Ivan start coughing from that much laughing .

Sasha: And that my friends ... IS THEORY OF HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER !!!

Igor (laughing): That makes no sense !

Bogdan: How about we take a seat and enjoy the show ?

Kath (smiling): Sounds great .

And so, the entire flight was full of grinning and laughing due to Sasha's comedic talents . That was relaxing for the crew ... because a hard challenge awaited them once again...