Diary of the Forgotten Kid: Raw Thoughts!

Diary of the Forgotten Kid: Raw Thoughts! Part 4

So today I haven't slept but something feels different. Last night I was about to overdose and today I'm a completely changed person well at least for today I'm slowly finding myself again. You may be thinking "oh well this is no fun he isn't depressed so why should I continue reading" but I think it's amazing that after all these years of suffering from this depression that I can sit and smile for all the right reasons. Why you ask? Let me explain. So last night I was going to overdose because I was in a very dark place and I needed serious help which no one was willing to help me with which to be honest I've began to expect anyways. But what changed was somebody was added to a group chat I was in. She was full of life, love and laughter and she always would make jokes even though she was called a kid and being mocked for being a kid. I found that she had the purest of hearts and I began to smile at the fact that no matter people were saying to her she played along and she laughed it off. So anyways I ended up going to go to overdose when I get a message out of nowhere from her. Surprised, I had to check what that message was and what was said which read "hey you okay". I was intrigued to know why she would message me and why out of all the times to message me it was now and why out of all the people who know me, the person who doesn't even know me for an hour is asking if I'm okay. I replied with "yeah I'm just sorting something out" because I was afraid to tell her the real me.  But she asked if everything was okay and I was breaking down so I gave it a chance and I said fuck it I'll just vent out to her. I explained everything and she gave me tons of advice and stayed up with me all night to make sure I was okay. To make sure I was safe. No one has ever done that for me ever. All my life I've put people before me but for the first time ever someone ruined their sleep because they cared about me and they wanted to help me and I respect her so much for the impact she's had on me. Cuz I thought of it like this... Even if I have depression and I get suicidal thoughts and I overthink, if it wasn't for all of that I would've never met her and then I realise that no matter how tough life gets, there's always blessing along the way. I have so much love for her and I'm always keeping her in my prayers now. I know this isn't a depressing part but I'm hoping it's the start for something new and I really wanted to let people know that if you are suffering from depression, there's hope. I love you all ❤️ thank you for being a part of my journey so far... I'm ready to find myself again and I hope we all can one day 🙏🏽