Someone Will Remember Us | Diana Barry & Anne Shirley

Chapter Two | An Angel and a Demon

Diana had tried to forget all about the soiree, but it was as if Anne - with her supporting words about Aunt Josephine and Gertrude - had lit a fire in Diana. A peculiar flame, that only seemed to grow stronger if you tried to not pay any attention to it.
Now the memories were only harder to ignore, since Diana found herself in the same house where it all had happened.
Diana and her friends had come to Aunt Josephine's house for help: they wanted to show the whole town of Avonlea what a great teacher Ms Stacy really was.

While Diana collected light bulbs from different lamps, Aunt Josephine came up to her with some money.
"I'm giving you children train fare to get home. You've had enough adventure for one day." She said with a smile.
Diana thanked for the money, and looked at her.
"You won't tell mother and father about all this, will you?" Diana asked, a little worried.
"And reduce your opportunities for other enriching adventures?" Aunt Josephine came closer to Diana, and said with a small grin:
"Never."
Diana chuckled. Aunt Josephine often surprised, she was no aunt out of the ordinary. Diana had always known this, even before the things revealed at her party. Josephine Barry never really cared what others thought or expected of her, but rather found her own way of doing things. Diana always enjoyed visits at her Aunt Josephine - you never knew what was to happen.

Diana noticed that Aunt Josephine was looking at Cole, who was admiring a piece of heart. The look in her aunt's eyes made her believe that Aunt Josephine somehow felt Cole's pain. But she couldn't explain it. It was like they had a secret understanding between them since the party, a code only the two of them could decipher.
"Cole's gone through so much." Diana said, looking at her aunt. "Were you able to comfort him?"
Diana was curious. She had noticed that Cole seemed more colourful after the party, more bright. He used to always look so grey, in a way.
"He knows I understand him, and support him." Aunt Josephine assured.

Diana fell silent, hesitating. Part of her wanted Aunt Josephine to admit that she indeed had lived poorly. Admit that what Gertrude and she had done - what they had been - was wrong.
But Diana couldn't acknowledge that Anne's and Cole's words still echoed her mind. And as she now saw Aunt Josephine stand before her, tall as ever, she didn't think of her as "one of them", or a sinner. She couldn't. This was her aunt, who she had always loved. And does love, still.
Diana almost felt ashamed of her thinking. Even though a part of her believed - or had been taught to believe - that she was right to think it was wrong, she had to admit to herself that she wanted to be wrong. Oh, how she wanted to be wrong. Looking at Aunt Josephine, she truly wondered how she was able to be so happy, stand so proud, being what she was.
"I know I... disappointed you." Diana began, as Aunt Josephine turned to face her. "At your soiree."
Aunt Josephine seemed troubled. "I was under the impression that I'd disappointed you."
"No, it's just..."
Diana knew exactly what she wanted to say, what she wanted to believe was true. But she didn't dare to admit it, not even to herself. She couldn't!
"At the time, I didn't know how much I didn't know."
"And now?" Aunt Josephine tried.
There was so much Diana wanted to say, but didn't dare too. Her whole life she had believed in a husband and a wife as the only option and that imagining anything else was wrong. The ideas had been easier to shut down before, when she didn't know of anyone else being like her.
But now, with all the new impressions, the feelings demanded to be heard, to be felt. Diana had no idea she could feel this much. No words would be able to explain what she felt, nor everything that was going through her mind.
But if she could talk to anyone about all this, it must be Aunt Josephine.

Diana gave Aunt Josephine a desperate hug.
"I'm sorry." Diana said, keeping her in a hug. "My thinking was narrow."
As Diana let go of her aunt,she felt her heart beat rapidly against her chest.
There. She had said it.
Ever since the soiree, Diana had been split apart; an angel and a demon, constantly screaming at each other, fighting for Diana's attention. One believed that love could be shared between two women, likewise the love between a man and a woman, while the other insisted that it was absurdly wrong. Problem was, Diana couldn't decide which opinion that belonged to the angel, and which belonged to the demon.
Diana faced Aunt Josephine and saw gratitude in her face. This encouraged her to continue, to believe that she listened to the angel and not the demon.
"I understand so much more now."
Aunt Josephine replied with a wide smile. "Oh." She happily let out. "Life is short and the world is wide, dear heart." Aunt Josephine said, and planted a kiss on Diana's forehead.
She put her hand on Diana's cheek, and Diana couldn't help but let out a breath with a little laugh.

Even though the angel and the demon still was shouting at one and another, she felt comforted by her Aunt Josephine. She seemed to be fine, being what she was. Diana still had a long way to go, but now she almost dared to hope - believe - that she would be fine too. Without having to hide who she is, who she loves.
For a minute, the devil silenced.
For a minute, she believed it was the angel who assured Diana that she would be okay, being like Aunt Josephine.