Memories // s.m

I

Shawn's POV

I opened my eyes and went to the kitchen. I heard my phone ringing so I grabbed it.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Shawn, I hope you didn't forget about your today's interview." I heard Andrew's voice.

"I didn't." I rolled my eyes.

"Ok, the car will be there in 30 minutes. See you later."

"Yeah bye." I hang up and started to getting ready.

When I finished, I called Bryan.

"Hey, Shawn." I heard his voice.

"Hi Bryan, how does she feel?" I asked, sitting on the couch.

"Not so good. Every night she woke up screaming and crying. The doctors said that she lost almost half of her memory but sadly she remembers when that asshole kidnapped her. She doesn't remember his face cause we showed her a picture of him and she didn't react, she just remembers what he was doing to her."

"Fuck." I sighed.

I would like to go see her. I want to see her. I need to see her but I can't..

She told the nurse to not allow me in the room.

I was broken when I heard of that. I had breakdowns every night and my mental health was getting worse day by day.

I think that I didn't realize how much I needed that girl in my life. She was my little sunshine.

Yeah.. she was..

Now she didn't even remember my name.

My ringing phone takes me away from my thoughts.

"The car is here Shawn." I heard my manager's voice.

"Ok, I'm coming." I hang up.

I locked the door of my apartment and take the elevator to get downstairs. When I was outside I directly saw the big black car. I opened the door and went in.

"How do you feel Shawn?" Asked Andrew.

"How do you think I feel?" I asked annoyed. My manager knows about all what happened. I told him that I don't feel well at all for interviews, concerts, photoshoots and stuff like that. But he told me I have to do that for my best.

My best right now would be to sit in Maddie's room and talk with her. Laugh with her, kiss her, hug her, hold her little soft hands,..

Not knowing when I felt tears streaming down my face. I quickly remove them with my hand.

"We are here." He said and got out of the car.

I sighed seeing tons of fans in front of the radio's studio. I love my fans with all my heart, it's thanks to them that I am where I am right now in my life but.. I don't feel well to take pictures or talk with them. I don't want to talk with anyone, I just want sit in my room, alone.

"I'm sorry guys but I can't take pictures right now! I love you all so much!" I said while getting out of the car.

"It's ok!! We love you too!!" I heard a girl screaming and a little smile appeared on my face.

Then I saw something that made my smile drop immediately. Paparazzi's.

"Ugh." I groaned.

"Shawn is it true that something was up between you and Maddie Brown!?"

"Shawn is that true that you have a girlfriend!?"

"Is it true that you two broke up!?"

"Shawn I heard a rumor said that you were abusing of Maddie Brown, you were beating her and that you even raped her! Is it true!? And is she in the hospital because of you!?"

I feel my blood boil when I heard that one. I saw him and went to him. I grabbed him by his collar and throw his camera away.

"What the fuck are you talking about!? I would NEVER hurt a woman like that!!! Especially not Maddie!! She is not in the hospital because of me and all of you right here..!" I looked at all the terrified paparazzi's "MIND YOUR OWN FUCKING BUSINESS!!" I feel someone grab my arm and pull me in the studio.

"What are you doing Shawn!!?" I heard my manager screaming at me.

"You know what? Fuck that shit." I said and went out of the building by the security exit doors.

I grabbed my phone and called an Uber. I waited 5 minutes and he was here. I went in.

"To the nearest bar, please." I said and he nodded.

After 15 minutes he stopped the car. I gave him money and went out of the car.

I looked in front of me. Out of mind bar.

I went in and I went straight to the bartender.

"5 shots please." I asked.

"How old are you?" He asked suspiciously.

"Dude give me those shots. Can you imagine my life right now? No you can't. My girlfriend is in the hospital, she lost her memory and don't give a fuck about me. Everyone is pissing me off and I just want to fucking disappear. I need alcohol, right now." I looked at him. He sighed and finally gave up.

He makes 5 shots and gave them to me. I smiled and drink them all in a split of a second. Feeling my throat burn a little bit.

"Another 5 please." I said.

I got 5 more and another 5 and I wasn't able to control myself anymore.

"Dude maybe you should stop." I heard the blurry voice of the bartender.

"N-n-ah g-giv-ve me 5 m-more." I mumbled.

I soon felt someone grabbing my phone out of my pocket.

"Hello? Yes um so your friend is here really drunk and he is going to pass out in any minutes so can you please come to pick him up? Thank you." The bartender gave me my phone again.

"Your friend is coming to pick you up."

"T-Thanks." I closed my eyes and fell asleep on the counter.