The Husband Checklist

2. reputation

The tears slid down my cheeks in warm torrents, blurring the words written on the screen as they landed on it with an audible "plop."

The price I had to pay for breaking up with the most popular boy in the city was not one that I had expected. It was a hefty sum, and I wasn't quite sure that my soft, now broken heart would be able to bear it.

"Ilhaam Moosa, your average slut in a hijab" was the caption that marked the picture that was circulating at speeds that I could not comprehend. More than two hundred people had forwarded it to me - some friends, some concerned acquaintances, and some enemies who would be gloating at this victory.

I had never sent Yusuf a complete nude photograph, but the picture on the screen was no less disgusting. It was one I had taken even before I had put on my hijab. It was even taken before Yusuf and I had officially begun dating.

Lace underwear and a lace bralette. My hair cascaded down my shoulders as I smiled sneakily at the camera. My thigh-high boots, though an attempt at retaining some modesty, just made the picture even more "appealing" to the boys who would view it.

I knew with certainty that this would cause a stir in the community, and most people would assume that I wanted it. I'd be plagued by all the boys who wanted a taste of what they saw. I was a trophy once again, and everyone within my old friend circle would be envying me.

I, on the other hand, had intended to break up with Yusuf, delete all my pictures and leave this life behind.

Just moments ago, my future had shimmered in the horizon like a dream just moments away from being caught. My future seemed almost certainly perfect - I would become that Muslim girl that every mother wanted to have. I would be the girl whose reformation overpowered every undesirable action I'd committed in the past.

Now, I was the girl with street credit and a prize attached to my name. I was the girl who didn't have boundaries and was loose enough to gain every boy's eye but not his respect.

Now, I was the girl with her reputation in tatters.