Still Dreamin' About U (lil peep x reader)

⑰ taking bars 'til we on mars

[𝐘/𝐍] 𝐏𝐎𝐕

The intoxicating smell of Marijuana floated in my nose, smoked traveled around my head.

I turned over to greet Gustav, my beautiful peepers. He was taking a long drag from his joint. Exhaling the smoke into the room.

My eyes traveled down his body taking in every fine detail, eyes, nose, mouth, jaw, Adam's apple, chest, arms, stomach, and the ruffles of blanket on top of his legs.

I shifted slightly, scooting closer to Gus, putting up my thumb and pointer finger signifying I wanted a hit.

Looking down at me I saw a smile spread across his face.

"Good morning, cutie."
Gus said with a hazy tone.

I smiled at him as I took small hits from his joint.

I could feel my eyelids drooping as I sunk farther into the mattress.

Laying here, next to someone I truly care about, feels so different from times before.

Yeah I guess I've loved people,
people have loved me, but this?
This shit right here is what it's all for.

This why we keep living.
To feel something y'know?

To feel like you mean something to well, anyone.
The fact, that I get to lay here, with not just anyone,
but with Gus,
I must've done something right in my past life.

I think all this shit in my head, but all I can really focus on right now how fun it is to get high with pretty boys.

I don't know how long we've been sitting here, honestly I don't care.
I sit and watch him, as his eyelashes flutter softly while watching me.

Warm hands, with a light grasp,
laying softly on my back.

Vulnerability is such a scary concept for me that I've never been able to pleasantly experience.
My fears that have complied from past events still stand, but my hard exterior is broken down when I'm with him.
I really am a softie I guess.

How could I not fall to pieces? With those brown eyes and chiseled features, he draws you right in.

I was pulled out of my infatuated trance when Gustav spoke.

"I hope someday I'm gonna make something, that'll mean something, to somebody. Not just to my momma or grandpa, or for myself, but to every body."

With his fingers still tracing patterns around my shoulder blades, his eyes staring longingly towards the wall. 
His tender intentions bled through his dreamy statement.

A million ideas and 10 million unspoken words that he could not yet express, wrapped up into two compact sentences.

I let out a faint laugh, followed by a lighthearted sigh,

"Gus, I know someday you'll make something.., you'll be something to everybody. You'll make something for yourself and prove everybody who told you that you fucking couldn't that you fucking can!"