Whiskey Lullaby

I couldn't sleep at all that night, all I could think about was Scout. I had seen those signs somewhere before, I knew what she meant when she had said that she was fine. Kristen had said the same thing and by the time I knew what she meant, it was too late and I couldn't let that happen to Scout.

Regardless of how late it was, I pulled my phone out and sent Scout a text.

I know what you meant when you said you were fine. 

A couple minutes later, my phone beeped to notify me that I had recieved a message.

Uh, yeah. It means that I'm fine.

Kristen said the exact same thing and she wasn't fine.

It took you awhile to figure that out with her, why so quickly with me?

Because, I had never saw those signs before, I didn't think I would. I always saw Kris as a happy girl.

Don't think that I need help, because I don't.

Let me help you. I can't lose someone else.

She never replied that night, so I just lay in my bed, staring at the ceiling, hoping and praying that sleep would come soon.

Morning came before I knew it, I rolled out of bed and changed my clothes. I wanted to get to school early so I could talk to Scout about the conversation that we had the night before. I grabbed my trusty skateboard, an energy bar, my bag and headed out the door.

She was in her normal spot, leaning against the hood of her car with her headphones on, eyes closed. I had to make sure that I didn't tick her off. 

I skidded to a stop once I got close enough to her, when she noticed me, she slid her headphones off, "I don't need a speech about how you can help me."

I let out a loud sigh, man, this girl was stubborn as ever, "Scout, listen to me. I know what you're going through because I'm going through the exact same thing ever since I lost Kris. Something is always there in the back of my mind saying that it's my fault. It's my fault that she's dead because I didn't notice the signs early enough to save her. I'm not going to let that happen again."

"Just let it happen," Scout mumbled while picking her bag up off the ground.

I grabbed her arm, my grip loose, "No. I'm not going to let you live with this because trust me, it's not fun. It's not something you can just cure, but it is something you can defeat."

She pulled her arm away from me, "I don't want to defeat it."

I wasn't going to give up easily so I grabbed her arm once again, my grip stronger this time, "You are going to defeat this. I'm going to help you. This damn monster that people call depression isn't going to take another one of my friends away from me. I won't let it."

She stared at me for what felt like an hour, her blue eyes staring into my own, her black hair blowing around her face due to the wind, "Alright, fine. I'll let you help me. But don't you dare think that it'll be easy because believe me, it won't be."

I didn't say another word, i just pulled her into my arms and let her cry into my shoulder.