Behind Every Smile

Chapter Twelve

Kelli:

     I looked back at Lincoln with a grimace on my face as Ry dragged me off. I saw the way that that Charlie kid was staring at Ry and something about it seemed off to me. He wasn’t just checking her out, guys did that all the time but she is seriously to clueless to notice, it was more greedy and possessive. Whatever it was, I didn’t like it. No wonder Lincoln was angry.

     “So are you ever going to finish telling me about your problem with both Linc and Rob only being your friend,” I asked her once we were in the water.

     “Well, I’m not really sure myself. It’s just I’ve been getting really close to both of them. Honestly, Linc and I do act like a couple. We hold hands, go out together, he always pays for me, he does all these sweet little things for me and when he smiles at me my heart gives a little leap.” She got the biggest smile on her face while she was talking. I knew they were close, but Ry was obviously developing a crush on Linc. Linc has always acted this way around her so figuring out his feelings would be more difficult. “But then again we’ve always acted like this and I’ve known him as long as I’ve known Jamie! Then Robbie and I are also really close and I really like spending time with him. This past week has been so amazing. I didn’t worry about what Jamie would think or if it was wrong or right, and I just can’t help but smile when I’m with him. He brings out the best of me. I feel stronger and more independent. But, he said that he likes my friend Siena… Oh and some other girl he didn’t name. So this is why I am confused and have no idea what to do. I think I like them both as more than just friends, but I know I’ve been friendzoned.” Ry finished her little rant with a sigh.

     I put my arm around her shoulder as we sat in the shallow water of the wave pool. I knew that Ry had a really low self esteem and couldn’t see how amazing and beautiful she is and that had caused her to go through a dark period. That’s all I know. The only person who actually knows anything about what happened is James. The rest of us just refer to it as the dark days, that is if we talk about it at all. Ry was our little ray of sunshine and when she was going through her worst the rest of us didn’t fair much better.

     “Just take it one day at time. Be yourself. Lincoln absolutely adores you, maybe it will turn into more than friendship, and as far as this Robbie kid goes just let things stay as they are. Sure, he likes your friend but he also likes someone else. Maybe it won’t work out with either of them. Stay positive love,” I told her.

     She smiled back at me. “Thanks Kel. I knew I could count on you to put this all in perspective. Could you imagine if I tried talking to my brother about this?”

     I couldn’t contain my laughter. James definitely would have had a heart attack, then proceeded to kick his best friend’s ass and probably kill her friend Robbie. In fact, if he had seen Charlie looking at Ry earlier that kid would have been within seconds. Ryanne laughed with me as we people watched. There were definitely some good looking guys worth checking out.

     We met back up with Lincoln and Charlie after a bit and the four of us had a really good time. I was walking beside Lincoln and he was watching Charlie hit on Ryanne a little ways in front of us.

     “You know, I really can’t tell if you’re okay with Charlie and Ryanne flirting or not,” I told him.

     “I’m not sure. She deserves to be happy and date, but it’s hard to watch. Besides, I didn’t like the way he was staring at her earlier.”

     “I know what you mean. There was something off about the look on his face.”

     We continued on our way back to the car, walking in silence. Lincoln was staring at the ground with a confused pout, his hands were shoved in his pockets and his shoulders were hunched over. He kept kicking a small rock.

     “Kel….” He started hesitantly, as if he was unsure whether or not he should ask me something.

     I took his arm and turned him to face me. “What is it Linc?”

     “Why does Baby always cover herself up? She always wears a one piece swim suit and she never wears those shirts that show her stomach like all the other girls do. Her shorts, skirts, and dresses aren’t even that short. Most of the time her clothes are baggy…” He trailed off, looking at me with confusion in his eyes. “I just don’t understand Kelli! She’s so beautiful. Her body is amazing. Why doesn’t she show it off? James would probably shit himself if she did, but I’ve never even seen her wear anything even kinda inappropriate.”

     I sighed. I wasn't quite sure how to tell him this. It probably wasn't my place to tell him in the first place, but he looked so lost, confused, and concerned. I could tell how much he cared for one of my best friends. "Linc, Ry doesn't see herself that way. If you told her what you just said about her beauty and amazing body, she'd laugh in your face. Ryanne honestly thinks that she is ugly and fat. That's why she never shows anyone her stomach and wears such baggy clothes. She's afraid of what other people would think or say about her. About how fat she is. It's also why she always has makeup on. She doesn't feel the least bit pretty without it. She barely feel pretty with it. Ry doesn't think she's good enough for anything or anyone. Can you really blame her though with you and James running off every guy who's even been slightly interested in her? It's only helped her fears of being unwanted and unloved; only helped to confirm her doubts of being fat and ugly because she's never had a boyfriend and when someone asks  her to a dance it's always one of your friends that you bully all night long." I stopped my rant for a second breathing heavily. I wasn't sure if I should continue or not. 

     Lincoln looked shocked beyond all belief. He stood there staring at me with his mouth agape. I looked in front of us to see Ry glaring at me, ignoring Charlie’s attempts to hold on to her attention. I turned back to Linc and suddenly noticed how close we were. My hand still rested on his upper arm, and one of his hands was gripping my hip to prevent me from moving. After what Ry told me earlier I wasn’t surprised by her reaction. I could tell what it probably looked like from her point of view. I hope she lets me explain before getting too upset though.

     “Come on. It’s time to go.” I said leading him back to the car. I sent a quick text to Ry telling her to sit in the back with me so we could talk. I saw her nod at me and we both climbed into the back.