Dragons Rising ✔️

Ch 38: Mental Cleansing

We stood there in silence for a minute, which was made uncomfortable by the fact that she seemed to be staring at my forehead. Had I grown some other strange feature to match my fangs?

"Your rider mark is still white, so I assume you haven't completed the mental cleansing yet?" Her concerned gaze dropped to meet mine.

It took me a minute to remember what she was talking about. It had been over a month since Sarafin had told us the Academy's stance on erasing mental echoes from our minds, but since I'd figured out Leera was sentient, I hadn't really thought about it.

"I don't have mental echoes."

She looked even more worried than she had before. "You mean, you haven't heard any voices that seem to come from your dragon?"

"Well, yeah, but that's just Leera talking to me. Doesn't BlueIsle talk to you?"

"Uh..." She looked so nervous that I thought she might faint. "Ella, dragons can't talk. They're just animals. You've been hearing some kind of magical mental echo this whole time, and listening to it could be dangerous. You need to complete the mental cleansing."

I finally realized why everyone had thought it was so strange that I might be embarrassed by Leera. I'd thought that everyone else had realized the truth about dragons like I had, but I should have known better.

Leera was unusually stubborn, and she had never followed any of my commands if she didn't want to. BlueIsle and Kuertis's dragon were smaller, less aggressive, and obviously less independent. If BlueIsle wasn't willing to put her rider in danger to get her to listen, I couldn't imagine how she could've changed Tawny's mind on the subject.

Now, on a sensitive mission where my secret was more at risk than ever, I couldn't afford to make Tawny doubt me, but I still couldn't let her shut BlueIsle out of her mind like this. As much as I felt like I wanted to shut Leera out sometimes, I couldn't imagine how terrible it would be for her if I didn't even give her the chance to express her true feelings. I couldn't help but feel sorry for BlueIsle, whose depressed behavior now made sense.

"You shouldn't have done the mental cleansing with BlueIsle. They're not just big, flying horses. The thought echoes aren't echoes. They really are our dragons trying to talk to us."

She frowned in a pensive sort of way, and I almost thought I'd gotten through to her. Then she placed her hand on my shoulder and said, "Nurse Isma gave me a potion that I think might help with your... little problem. I don't need it anymore, so you should take it."

I shook off her hand. "I'm not going to take any potions from Nurse Isma."

"They really do help. When I started taking them, I noticed a difference right away. Now I never hear any echoes."

"I have no doubt they block out your dragon's thoughts, but I don't need the potion, and you should start looking for a cure to undo what you've done before it's too late."

She bit her lip. "It's worse than I thought. You honestly believe the thought echoes mean your dragon is sentient."

"She is sentient, and so is yours. You've got to stop blocking her out."

"El, if you took the potion, you wouldn't have as many problems with Leera obeying. Just look at BlueIsle." She gestured toward the prone dragon laying by her tent. "She never runs away or throws me off her back like Leera does to you."

I scoffed. "Because she so depressed that she can hardly move."

"She's not depressed. She's laid-back and under control."

"She's depressed. I would be to if someone rode me around all the time and wouldn't even let me talk from time to time."

Brows furrowed, she took hold of my hands. "Dragons don't think like us, and it's not healthy for you to pretend that they do, not if you let your dragon push you around because of it."

I yanked my hands back. "They do think like us, more or less. And it's not healthy for you to pretend that they don't. Not for you, and definitely not for BlueIsle."

She opened her mouth to argue further, but Kuertis interrupted her.

"The fish is cooked."

Tawny glanced at him, then back at me. "For now, I suppose we'll just have to agree to disagree."

"I- I guess you're right." As much as I might've wanted to keep arguing, it wouldn't make a dent in her convictions, and it wasn't worth alienating her during a dangerous mission. "Agree to disagree. For now."

With that settled, we joined Kuertis and Clarisa for breakfast. It was as good as it could be, having been cooked over a fire with minimal seasonings, but I was more focused on Leera's disappearance than my meal.

We finished eating and packed up our stuff. The others put their gear on their dragons. I stood awkwardly by my stuff and hoped Leera hadn't been angry enough to stay away for more than the night.

After waiting for several minutes, Clarisa huffed. "We can't wait if she's not coming. You-Know-Who is leaving in less than a week."

If we had to get to the Ferentisian prince and his expedition in a week, I knew we couldn't waste time. By my calculations, we were at least two days from the Ferentisian border, and there would probably be more flying once we got across it. "Fine. Tawny, can I ride with you?"

After our argument and the fact that it had taken her ten minutes to get her depressed dragon to stand up, it wasn't an ideal situation, but the other options were Clarisa, who would probably throw me off for the fun of it, or Kuertis, who had resumed pretending I didn't exist.

Tawny nodded, eyes narrowed. I picked up my supplies and headed toward her.

[Where are you going?] Leera asked.

I glanced around but couldn't see her. A second later, she dove in from above and skidded to a stop next to her saddle, which I had been debating whether to bring or not. I carried my things back to her and set them down. She knelt without question, which surprised me.

[Leera, I-]

[Don't.]

My temper flared at having my apology interrupted for a second time. [Really?]

[You don't have to apologize.] She shuffled her wings. [We both said things we regret. Now, you'd better get on before Moonhawk's rider gets angry.]

I hoisted her saddle off the ground and onto her back. [She already is angry. Where were you?]

[I didn't wake up until a couple minutes ago.]

I tied my stuff to her saddle. [Can you fly all day?]

She stretched her wings experimentally and nearly knocked me over. [I should make it, but I won't tomorrow if I have to keep running around after you when I should be sleeping.] She pulled her wings in again, and I climbed up onto her back.

"Finally." Clarisa took off on Moonhawk.

Leera and I were second in the sky, followed by Kuertis, then Tawny. BlueIsle was exceptionally slow to take off, and it took Tawny constantly egging her on to make her keep up with us.

I sighed.

[What happened?] Leera asked.

[Tawny finished the mental cleansing.]

She shivered, which was the first time I'd seen her betray any type of real fear. [BlueIsle told me her rider was close.] Her tone was so downtrodden that it could've been me who'd completed the mental cleansing. [I told her to try something drastic, but she said her rider would come around eventually.]

[Somehow, I don't think that even something drastic would work with Tawny. At least, it didn't seem like that when I talked to her.]

Her mind was soft and grieving as we flew on in silence.