IS / WAS

iv. is

I could probably name about a few other more depressing events than this one.

There's that time in band camp with Tayler Craig (yes, his name was tayler – poor kid had to deal with his parent's bad naming decisions); He tasted like potato salad and ranch dressing - and when Mr. Daniels caught me cheating in class (I obviously wasn't, I was merely taking a quick look at my notes) and when I –

Yeah, who am I kidding nothing gets more depressing than this.

"Okay, so let me get this straight," Beth puts her hand on her hips, "You got shit-drunk last night –"

"Not shit-drunk I just had a few drinks." I say, rolling my eyes.

"Yeah, Celeste, that would be a great excuse; but, come on – look, even Coco doesn't buy it."

I look at mom's slobbery pug sitting on the floor contentedly snorting his little annoying pug snort and I sigh.

Beth continues, ". . . And then,"

I inhale slowly.

"You call your ex; your ex who, by the way - you just broke up with. "

I groan and Beth ignores me.

"And then . . . You tell her you still love her? Your Ex girlfriend?"

I exhale too soon and I start coughing, "No, I –"

I hide my face with my hands in frustration, "Yeah," I cringe, "I did."

Beth knits her eyebrows together and folds both her hands onto her lap in a I'm-your-big-sister-and-I-know-everything-so-listen-up-you-little-sucker way.

"Cece," I remember Jess as she says it and my heart stings a little (okay, maybe a lot but whatever), "Have you been ignoring Jess' calls?"

I am tempted to ask how the fuck she knows stuff like that, but I decide against it, realising how she'll probably rant on relentlessly about her "big sister" powers; so instead, I nod mournfully, "Uh – Yeah."

She looks at me like she's so sure of herself and I kind of want to puke all over her perfection.

Beth had literally always been the star in our family (the only actual normal person in our family, to be honest); I mean let's be real, Mom's about to marry some 40-something oceanologist for the 5th time, Dad's somewhere in Los Angeles; probably having one night stands, every night and me – well, yeah.

I take a sip from the glass of water.

"Call her."

Water immediately comes out of my nose and I start choking (not really but it adds a dramatic feel).

I start laughing at her, "That's a good one – wow, you're actually really funny, I mean it’s not the first time water came out of my nose but, wow it's the first time you've made me laugh."

I wipe away the water with my sleeve as I look up at Beth's serious face.

"Wait  – you were just joking.”

“Right?"

✿

She wasn't joking.

"You aren't joking."

She looks at me blankly, waiting for me to dial in Jess' number.

"You're fucking serious."

aggressive stare

"You actually want me to dial in Jess' number and call her."