Healer

Panic

The train station was empty, a brief reprieve from the crowds they pushed through to get there. The ceiling arched over their heads as they hurried along, Jimin trailing behind Taehyung and Jungkook with both hands firmly secured in theirs. A sleepy voice called after them, asking if they wanted to buy any souvenirs, but otherwise, the station was silent.

They arrived on the platform as the train was pulling in. Jimin stared at the long, cylindrical form. Jungkook pulled him inside, the doors closed, and he sat down on one of the empty benches. Immediately the world bent around him.

Not again.

He sucked in a breath, but the sound was distant, like someone had turned down the volume on the world. Before he had time to register the change, tears clouded his vision, and he closed them, drawing in on himself.

It's coming, he thought dimly. No--not here--not now--

Pain ripped through his body, tearing up his skin and piercing straight through his stomach and chest. He opened his mouth in a silent scream, and reality blurred around him. It wasn't a train, it was the palace, his room, the suffocating blankets--

"Jimin, it's okay. It's safe."

Jimin couldn't locate the source of the voice, and when a hand grabbed his arm he twisted, wrenching it away, and lashed out. Jungkook grunted, and Jimin pressed himself back against the side of the train, face contorting as his throbbing elbow smashed into the railing beside the door.

"You tried to escape. You made this hard on yourself. Don't look at me like that."

Jimin opened his eyes, a desperate attempt to layer reality over the images in his head, but it was useless. The pain in his head forced them shut again, and he opened his mouth to scream, but no sound would come out.

The man approached him, muscles bulging beneath his robe, and Jimin scrambled away, breath catching in his throat. He'd tried begging, he'd tried fighting, he'd tried running. Submitting wasn't an option. What was he supposed to do when they starved him, beat him, locked him in his room until he was sure he would go mad--

"Jimin, please, listen to me. You're safe."

Jimin shook his head, gripping the fabric over his chest even tighter as he twisted away again. He opened his eyes and swallowed, shrinking away. The two men loomed over him, both holding onto the upper railing for support. Jungkook's muscles flexed as the train swayed, and Jimin let out a breath, the last of his air, eyes wide. It was too much, he couldn't relax, it hurt--

"You're going to be okay," Jungkook said, "We'll be there in a few minutes. Please, breathe."

Jimin shook his head harder, gasping as Taehyung took hold of his arms and pulled him back up. He tried in vain to push Taehyung away, struggling to breathe past the tears and panic plugging up his throat. Taehyung wouldn't budge.

"Take a deep breath," he said.

Jimin shook his head quickly, tears blocking his vision. Without warning, his foot went numb. I can't, he chanted silently. I can't. I can't. I can't!

"That's not going to help, hyung," Jungkook groaned.

"Hush!" Taehyung grumbled, "He's hurting himself."

"And you're making it worse," Jungkook grumbled, pushing him away.

Jimin slumped against the back of the bench. Somewhere above him, the automated voice announced the station. Tears clouded his vision. He couldn't breathe. He couldn't see. His head and body ached.

Please, let me die, he begged, let me out. I want out!

"Jimin, listen to me," Jungkook said. "We'll be there in a few minutes. Do you think you'll be able to walk yourself?"

The honest answer? No. Jimin swallowed, pressing a shaking hand to his stomach. The automated voice repeated the station name, and the train slowed, coming to a stop. The doors opened with a hiss.

"Last chance," Jungkook said softly.

Jimin shoved himself to his feet and his numb foot slipped inward, sending him crashing into the younger man. Jungkook helped Jimin to his feet, supporting him gently, and they disembarked. Outside it was warm, with a light breeze, but Jimin couldn't sense anything else. He couldn't stop shaking. He couldn't speak. It hurt.

"Maybe we should call Seokjin-hyung," Jungkook said, pausing on the platform as the train pulled out. "Have him drive us up?"

"I can carry him," Taehyung said.

"Touch is obviously not a good idea right now," Jungkook snapped. "Look. Look at how bad he's shaking. We don't even know what just happened!"

Jimin swallowed, gritting his teeth as his knees buckled. Jungkook led him over to a bench, sitting him down and pulling out his phone. Jimin curled into himself and tried to ignore their argument. Why were they still making him move? It was useless. There was no way he would ever get better. He couldn't even ride a stupid train without losing his mind. How in the world was he supposed to live outside the temple?

"I mean it, Kook," Taehyung said. "I can carry him."

"I'm telling you it's not a good idea!"

Jimin leaned against the back of the bench, letting his head drop back and closing his eyes. A stray ray of sunlight warmed his shoulder as the two argued, lowering their voices so he couldn't hear over his own shaky breathing.

"Here," Taehyung said, gently, "I'll carry you now."

Jimin let out a gasp of pain and surprise as Taehyung picked him up, hoisting him into his arms. He whimpered as a muscle in his neck cramped, but Taehyung didn't seem to notice.
"It's just a few more seconds," he promised, "then you can lie down. Okay?"

Jimin nodded. It was all he could do. 

I'm so tempted to use this space to tell you about things that are only implied later. But that would ruin the story, right? I'll keep my mouth shut. ;)

Writing in Jimin's flashbacks was SO HARD. I make it a point to avoid writing smut, but-- ooooh hang on that might be a spoiler. 

Wait, no. I said he was a concubine, right? Fun fact: even though he's a male it's historically accurate, I checked. This takes place in a more fantasy-based world, but learning that men were taken as concubines as well really started the idea off. :p 

You can probably guess what he's gone through by now. Eep. Should I hide?