Healer

Stubborn

Jimin groaned, clutching his throat as his voice cracked. The guard chuckled from across the room, sneering as he sat up.

"Sore?"

Jimin ignored him, curling up in a ball and forcing the tears back. He was sore, it was true, but he would never admit it. His lower back ached, sending occasional shots of pain up his spine. He swallowed, reaching down to tug his shorts back over his thighs, and felt the scratch marks littering them.

They stung.

"People say you're the lucky one, you know," the guard said, sitting down and fiddling with the staff in his hands. "The emperor might keep you until you die. Thinks you're intriguing."

Jimin gritted his teeth. The angry retorts bubbled up inside him, then subsided-- momentary relief wasn't worth the punishment he'd get later.

"You going to ignore me? All proud of yourself?"

Jimin bit his lip. The guard stood again, towering over him, and it took all his strength not to cringe away, to keep his face straight, his gaze lowered.

"Fine, then. It's not like you'll ever be anything but his sex slave. Don't get uppity, kid. You'll be grateful later, when he throws you out."

Jimin swallowed. His throat buzzed, throbbing dully.

I never asked for this, he thought angrily. I never wanted to be here.

***

"So you were out here."

Jimin looked up, taking his hand off the flower he'd been holding, and stepped back, grimacing. Yoongi tipped his head, frowning quizzically, and shrugged.

"You don't need to look so startled," he said, "I'm always here."

Jimin frowned at him. What did that even mean?

"Jin says you haven't eaten today. He's worried."

Jimin sighed, scrunching his nose, and shook one hand out, trying to remember the signs Jungkook had taught him. How did he say it again...?

"Don't tell me you're not hungry, please," Yoongi said, shoving his hands in his pockets. "Being able to starve yourself doesn't mean you should."

Jimin frowned, shoving his hand back in the pocket of the hoodie Jungkook had given him.

"Are they aching again?" Yoongi asked, drawing closer and reaching out. "I can--"

Jimin shook his head, looking away, fighting for control of his face. Yoongi didn't need to know how afraid he was. He didn't need to know how much it hurt. He didn't need to know anything.

"Do I have to repeat myself?" Yoongi asked.

Jimin shook his head, scuffing one shoe against the balcony floor, and moved towards the door. Yoongi caught his shoulder, still looking straight ahead. Jimin looked at him in time to see his eyebrows move together, his eyelids lowering.

So he knew. Just like always.

"Don't hide it from me," Yoongi said, "I can't help you when I don't know what's wrong."

Jimin took a deep breath, looking down at his shoes. His throat constricted. Why do you have to say things like that? he wondered. Why do you have to be this way?

"I'll say it one more time," Yoongi said, voice lowering. "Do your hands hurt?"

Jimin clenched his hands in the pocket of the hoodie, gritting his teeth as his joints began to throb. Then, carefully, deliberately, he shook his head. 

Liar, liar, pants on fire. 

Okay, that's insensitive. But I've been on both sides of this equation and dang it, it is NOT fun. Lying about your pain or hiding it from people just makes it worse. Instead of airing out your feelings and maybe releasing them once and for all they fester, and you get bitter and start thinking in terms of a victim mindset. 

And then you blow up on the people who are just trying to help. 

Who am I kidding? You probably know this already. Society is inundated with self-help books saying the exact same thing. I just hope you're not trapped in that kind of situation right now. Please take care of yourself!