Anxiety is so much more;
It's so much more than the way it's shown in the media,
It's more than just bouncing knees and racing thoughts,
It's more than stuttering and blushing.
Anxiety is sitting in front of your whole family looking happy and normal while your stomach dances.
It's sitting there having an out of body experience where you feel trapped in your body.
It's scratching and picking at your hands until they bleed.
It's feeling like you can't breathe while watching your chest rhythmically rising and falling.
It's planning out your walking route and regularly changing it, just in case.
It's thinking about how you're going to react to something that might happen.
Anxiety is so much more then the way it's shown in the media,
it is invasive and quiet,
it's like a ghost haunting your soul and never leaving the back of your mind.
Anxiety is the web of lies your brain made to scare you,
to make you panic,
to make you fear for your life even though the threat is just a thread in the web in your mind.
My anxiety suffocates me and makes me disassociate.
My anxiety scares me so I don't feel like my body is mine.
I'm trapped inside as I'm suffocating invisibly being destroyed,
broken and torn apart.
My anxiety is so much more and it might be my weakness,
but it's also my superpower.
I work well in emergencies,
I've imagined them all before,
I am strong,
facing new demons every day.
My anxiety can't beat me every day,
can it?
-my anxiety
YOU ARE READING
Writing Until My Soul Recovers
PoetryI'm seventeen with more trauma than most my age. I haven't cut in five months but I'm struggling. My mental health is struggling and it's hard because I'm in recovery from something. But not my big problem. I'm still struggling with that and I was t...
