like a redheaded stepchild

Chapter 20: The Dark Lords a what?

The breeze flew Harry's ginger hair dramatically as he swooped down on Luna, and he grinned at her as she swooned at his approach.

"Oh, Luna, you're so beautiful. I think you must have infected me with nargles." Harry's chest bulged with muscles as he flexed, then he reached down from his Firebolt to haul Luna up onto the broom with him. Her rancid breath washed over his face as they kissed, her slobbery kisses and tongue washing over his face and-

Harry's eyes snapped open and he found a large black dog beside his bed, licking his face enthusiastically.

"Ew, stop that," Harry hissed, shoving the dog away and reaching for his glasses. "Sirius, what are you doing here? I thought you were spying on Sleepy the Wonder Turban."

The dog whined and tugged at Harry's shirt collar. "Ugh! Fine, I'm getting up, just keep quiet."

Harry stumbled out of the tent, tugging on his robes. He followed the dog out into the woods, where it turned back into-

"Bloody hell!" Harry swore, drawing his wand and pointing it at the odd looking old man with a peg leg.

"Ha! Gotcha!" the man cackled, his odd fake eye whirling about crazily. "Relax Harry, I'm still your dogfather. I'm just polyjuiced to look like Mad Eye Moody right now."

"Give it up Harry, I told him not to polyjuice himself before he went to get you but he insisted," the weary voice of Professor Lupin said as the ex-teacher stepped out from behind a tree.

"Oh, well, I guess that's OK then." Harry lowered his wand and glanced around, shivering slightly. "But what did you call me out here for?"

"Pranking!" the false Moody said gleefully, rubbing his hands. "We're going to cast the Dark Mark on Voldequirrel's orders. Should be great fun."

"Only you would think putting up the Dark Mark is fun," Lupin muttered.

"Come off it Moony, it's not like we're going to go muggle baiting or anything. We're just to put up the Dark Mark and go about in these robes scaring people a bit. Here, Harry, drink this." Sirius handed Harry a bottle of potion, which smelled very much like wet dog.

"What is this?" Harry demanded, making a face as he examined the vial.

"Polyjuice! Got a bit of my own hair in it. You get to go as me, an internationally renowned ladies man."

"I think I'm a bit more worried about the fact that people also think you're a Death Eater right now," Harry grumbled, but downed the potion all the same. His body contorted a bit, until he was taller than before. He reached up and tugged at his hair. "Ugh, this is too long. You should really get a haircut."

"But the ladies love my silky locks!" Sirius protested.

"Well right now you look like something that a troll picked from between his toes, so I wouldn't put too much stock in that," Harry grumbled.

Lupin sighed and looked up at the dark sky. "Can we just get this over with?"

"Fine, fine," the moody Black said, taking out his wand. He raised it, then paused, looking confused as his magical eye swiveled wildly. "Er. Um, how do you cast a dark mark?"