"She said 'you're too young to be depressed' once when I was upset."
"That's BS."
Most of her near death experiences
Are suicide attempts
But I've tried killing myself;
I'm also too reckless.
Because I'm not supposed to run in front of cars
I'm not supposed to try to OD.
My mother seems to think depression is for adults
She doesn't know.
Her mother never said a word
She only knows about her.
I'm too young
Too young to be empty
To fake smiles
To cut my skin
To be broken like a porcelain doll
Too young to know the cruelty of the world.
They play it off
"Kids are cruel."
"Sticks and stones may break my bones, but words will never hurt me."
"They apologized, so it's fine now."
But do they know?
Fat
Ugly
Freak
Bitch
Evil bitch
Whore
"I think it just makes you more of a bitch."
Stupid
Uncool
Doesn't deserve to have friends
"Don't listen to her."
I got my heart broken playing party games with loneliness.
Games like hide and go seek in a field of the naïve
Pin the blame on the hopeful
Don't fall off the tightrope.
And I'm too young
To want to die.
YOU ARE READING
S H A T T E R E D
Poetryhere. Here will be a series of things Tragic Sad Whatever you call it Things Things I haven't shared Finally shared The things I've kept inside