THE SMILING PROUD WANDERER by Jin Yong

Headmaster Part 3

Then No Commandment continued, "My Buddhist name is No Commandment, so I don't adhere to any rules or commandments. But this Tian Boguang has committed a lot of bad things in Jianghu. If he didn't abstain from committing more of these piles of misdemeanours, how can he be under your school and become your disciple? Master Linghu wouldn't have liked this also. In the future, he's going to receive my alms bowl; that's why his name also has the words 'No Commandment'."

They suddenly heard a person said, "Monk No Commandment and Monk Cannot Have No Commandment are both joining the Heng-Shan School. The Peach Valley Six Fairies are also going to join Heng-Shan School."

The Peach Valley Six Fairies had come and the one who spoke just then was Peachtree Trunk Fairy.

Peachtree Root Fairy said, "We were the first people to see Linghu Chong, so the six of us are big martial brothers, while Monk No Commandment is little martial brother."

Linghu Chong thought, "Since there are Great Master No Commandment and Tian Boguang in Heng-Shan School already, there's no harm in accepting the Peach Valley Six Fairies as well. This way, it'll remove those talks in Jianghu about Linghu Chong becoming the headmaster of a group of nuns and young ladies." He then said, "Peachtree Six brothers are willing to enter the Heng-Shan School, then that's really good then. But it's very troublesome to arrange the seniority order one by one so it's better if we just leave it alone!"

Peachtree Leaf Fairy said, "No Commandment's disciple is called Cannot Have No Commandment. When in the future, Cannot Have No Commandment accepts a disciple, what will his Buddhist name be?"

Peachtree Fruit Fairy answered, "Cannot Have No Commandment's disciple's Buddhist name must also have the words 'Cannot Have No Commandment'. He can be called, 'Without Doubt Cannot Have No Commandment'."

Peachtree Branch Fairy said, "Then the disciple of 'Without Doubt Cannot Have No Commandment'; what would his Buddhist name be?"

Linghu Chong saw Tian Boguang's plight so he took his arm and led him away. "I have a few words to ask you."

"Alright," Tian Boguang answered.

The two of them quickened their steps and moved tens of feet away. But behind them, they still heard Peachtree Trunk Fairy saying, "His Buddhist name can be 'With Reason and Without Doubt Cannot Have No Commandment'."

Peachtree Flower Fairy added, "Then how about disciple of 'With Reason and Without Doubt Cannot Have No Commandment'? What would his Buddhist name be?"

Tian Boguang smiled bitterly and said, "Headmaster Linghu, that day I was forced by Grand Martial Master to go to Huashan to invite you to come and see the little Shi Tai. But there's a long story behind that."

Linghu Chong said, "I know that he forced you to take a poison, and he also tricked you by saying that he'd already sealed your death acupoint."

"I've already told you about that before. That day in the courtyard of the Jade House, I fought with that shorty Yu. After that, I thought about it and decided that there were too many heroes from the orthodox path for me to stay there for long. So I went north towards Hunan. I'm ashamed to talk about those days. My shortcoming became visible not long after. In Kaifeng prefecture, I sneaked into the room of a rich family's young lady in the middle of the night. I lifted the mosquito net and extended my hands to cop a feel, but I unexpectedly felt a bald head instead."

Linghu Chong laughed and said, "So to your surprise, she's a nun."

Tian Boguang smiled bitterly. "No, it was a monk."

Linghu Chong laughed loudly. "The young lady was inside the quilt sleeping with a monk. Never thought that this young lady would've stolen a man, and the man she'd stolen would be a monk."

Tian Boguang shook his head and said, "That's not it! That monk was Grand Martial Master. Originally, Grand Martial Master was looking for me. When he finally tracked my trail down, he found me at Kaifeng prefecture. That afternoon I was spying around that house and Grand Martial Master saw me. He guessed that I was up to no good, so he talked to that family and told that young lady to get out of trouble. Then he slept on that bed waiting for me."

Linghu Chong laughed. "Brother Tian must have really suffered this time."

Tian Boguang smiled bitterly. "Does that need saying? When I rubbed Grand Martial Master's head, I already knew that something's not right. Then I felt my stomach felt numb because he hit my acupoint there. Grand Martial Master jumped out of the bed and lighted a lamp. Then he asked me whether I want to die or live. I know that for my whole life I've been doing evil things, so there would be one day when I'd have a reckoning. So I quickly said, 'I want to die!'. Grand Martial Master thought that this was really strange so he asked me: 'Why do you want to die?' I said: 'I wasn't being careful and was captured by you. How can I still hope to live?' Grand Martial Master gave me a blank expression then indignantly said, 'You said you were captured by me only because you weren't careful. So you are implying that if you were a bit more careful, then I wouldn't be able to capture you. Alright!' As he said 'alright', he released my acupoint. Then I sat down and asked him: 'What is your order?' He said: 'You have a knife on your belt, how come you're not using it to chop me? You have two legs underneath your body, how come you're not jumping out of the window to escape?' I said: 'I'm a gentleman, how can I act like a shameless nobody?' He just laughed loudly and said: 'You're not a shameless nobody? You already paid respect to my daughter to take her as your master and yet how come you're disclaiming it?' I thought this was really strange so I asked: 'Your daughter?' He answered: 'On the top floor of that wine shop, you made a bet with that youngster from Huashan School. Saying that whoever lost would take my daughter as master. Could it be that it's all fake? I went up Heng-Shan to look for my daughter, and she told me everything from the beginning to the end.' I said: 'So that's how it is. That little nun is your daughter, that's really weird.' He asked: 'What's weird about that?'"

Linghu Chong laughed. "This matter really is quite strange. Other people become a monk after they've gotten a daughter, but Great Master No Commandment became a monk first before getting a daughter. His Buddhist name is called No Commandment. It means that he won't comply with any rules or commandments."

Tian Boguang said, "That's right. At that time, I said: 'That bet was only a trick, how could you take it as real? You're not wrong that I lost the fight in that bet, so I won't bother your daughter anymore.' Grand Martial Master then said: 'That won't do. You already said that you're going to take her as master, so you must take her as your master. You cannot not take my daughter as a master. I can't let anyone bully my own daughter. I spent a lot of effort to find you. You're very slippery and if it weren't for you committing these rapes, then it would've been really difficult to capture you.'

I saw him getting muddled and not speaking clearly, so I quickly used my 'Three Cloud Steps' and jumped out of the window. I thought that once I've used my lightness martial art, Grand Martial Master would definitely not be able to keep up with me. But I was surprised when I heard footsteps behind me because Grand Martial Master had chased me down. I called out: 'Big monk, you didn't kill me just then, so I won't kill you either. If you kept on chasing then I won't be polite anymore.' Grand Martial Master laughed loudly and said: 'How do you become impolite?' I pulled my knife out, turned around, and chopped down on him. But Grand Martial Master's martial art was really high. He only used his palms to trade moves with me. I didn't know how to use my fast knife to chop him, and after more than forty moves, he grabbed the back of my neck and snatched my knife away.

Then he asked me: 'Give up yet?' I said: 'I give up, you can kill me now!' He said: 'What's the use of killing you? Would it make my daughter alive again?' I was startled so I asked: 'Little Shi Tai is dead?' He said: 'She hasn't died yet, but she's as good as dead. I saw her at Heng-Shan and she was so thin that I can even see her bones. I cried when I saw her, and then I slowly asked her what happened. It was you who harmed her.' I said: 'If you wanted to kill me then kill me. Tian Boguang is an honest person and would never tell lies. I was rude to your daughter at first, but she was saved by Huashan School's Linghu Chong. I didn't violate her; she's still a young lady as pure as jade.' Grand Martial Master said: 'Your granny, what's the use of being as pure as jade? My daughter is lovesick; if Linghu Chong wouldn't take her as his wife, she wouldn't continue on living. But when I mentioned this to her, my daughter scolded me. She said something like Buddhists cannot have worldly desires; otherwise Buddha reproaches them and when you die you enter the eighteenth level of Hell.' Suddenly he clutched my neck and scolded me, 'Stinky kid, this is all your doing. If you weren't being rude to my daughter that day then Linghu Chong wouldn't have to come and save her. Then my daughter wouldn't have become that thin.' I said: 'That's not for certain. Little Shi Tai's beauty is like a goddess, even if I weren't being rude to her that day, Linghu Chong would certainly have come up with another reason to approach her'."

Linghu Chong scowled and said, "Brother Tian, what you said was too much."

Tian Boguang laughed and said, "I'm sorry that I offended you. At that time, the situation was desperate. If I didn't say that, Grand Martial Master would never have released me. Sure enough, when he heard this, he turned from angry to happy and said: 'Stinky kid, think for yourself how many bad things you have done in your lifetime? If it weren't for the discourteous way you treated my daughter, I would've flattened your head a long time ago.'"

Linghu Chong felt this was very odd, so he asked, "He's happy that you're being rude to her daughter?"

Tian Boguang answered, "He wasn't being happy, he was praising my foresight."

Linghu Chong couldn't help smiling. Tian Boguang went on, "Grand Martial Master lifted me in mid air with his left hand while his right hand gave me seventeen to eighteen whacks on the ear and I fainted. Then he soaked me in a small brook. When I woke up, he said: 'I'm giving you one month to go and invite Linghu Chong to go up Heng-Shan to see my daughter. Even if he couldn't take her as his wife for now, they can still talk and that'll be good enough. My daughter's life would be protected then. Your master has a problem but how come you didn't come and help as her disciple?' He then poked some of my acupoints and told me that they're the death acupoints. Then he forced me to take some poison saying that if I managed to invite you to come and see the little Shi Tai within the one month period, he would give me the medicine. Otherwise, the poison would come out and no medicine would be able to save me."

Linghu Chong had at last understood. That day when Tian Boguang came up to Huashan to invite him to come down the mountain, he kept everything a secret and didn't want to say anything clearly. Linghu Chong didn't expect that he would actually tell him everything at this time. Tian Boguang continued, "I went up Huashan to invite you, but I was defeated and I knew that it would be hard to keep my life further. To my surprise, Grand Martial Master was feeling uneasy so he personally took the little Shi Tai to come up to Huashan to look for you. Then he gave me the antidote, and afterwards I also listened to your advice not to rape and do those lecherous things anymore. But Tian Boguang's nature is lascivious and there are lots of women around. So whenever I have some money, I went to look for some prostitutes which is not a difficult thing to do. Half a month ago, Grand Martial Master found me again. He said that you were going to become Heng-Shan School's headmaster, but other people are ridiculing you behind your back and your reputation in Jianghu is being ruined. He loves everything, loves his daughter and son-in-law..."

Linghu Chong scowled and interrupted, "Brother Tian, you must never speak of this nonsense ever again."