How Troublesome

Chapter 3: Wearisome Women

Twenty minutes later, they stood outside the door to the Hokage's office. Shikarmaru, being the intelligent and brilliant man he was, hung back and let Naruto go ahead for safety reasons.

Without even knocking, Naruto pushed open the double doors energetically and yelled loudly, "Oi, Baa-chan! I'm here. What do you want?"

There was a smacking sound, and Lady Tsunade growled, "Don't call me that, brat!"

Figuring it was safe to enter the office, Shikamaru unhurriedly went in.

A large vein was pulsing in Lady Tsunade's forehead, and Naruto cowered before her, holding her head. He wouldn't expect anything else. He collapsed into a chair, out of the reach of the Hokage's fists. Lady Tsunade muttered something that sounded suspiciously like, "ungrateful brat," and gulped down some sake from the ever present supply on her desk.

It amazed him. Shikamaru knew he had a pretty high tolerance for alcohol, but she must have been immune with the amount she downed. How did she function? And what was she like sober?

The Hokage slammed her container of sake down on the desk and then leveled an impressive glare at the Nara. "What the hell took you so long? I sent you to get him two hours ago!" She stood up from her desk, large breasts bouncing dangerously.

Shikamaru would have pointed out that it hadn't been two hours... if he had a death wish. Instead, he started analyzing the room for possible exits.

What happened next surprised him slightly. "Wait! It wasn't Shikamaru's fault! I made him wait while I ate my ramen!" Naruto said, stepping in between the pissed of slug princess and the lazy genius.

Naruto had saved him? More than that, Naruto had lied to save him from getting his ass beat. Although, Naruto couldn't exactly tell Lady Tsunade that he was really a she and she and everything else that had happened. Well, maybe knowing Naruto's secret wouldn't be quite that troublesome. No, that was still just wishful thinking. Every single one of his better than average brain cells told him that this was going to be a completely wacked out, not in a good way, situation.

The Hokage stopped, halfway to Shikamaru, fist raised. "Ramen? It took that whole time because you were eating ramen?" Naruto nodded frantically, and then saw the dangerous look in her eyes, but didn't dodge fast enough. She slugged Naruto on the head again, "Brat! Eat your ramen on your own time!" She stomped back to her desk and sat down with a huff, leaving Shikamaru gazing at her lazily and Naruto nursing, not one, but two lumps on her head.

"Now," the Hokage said, "I called you here, Naruto, because I have a problem. Our village has been contracted to do a mission. By the Yugakure."

Shikamaru raised an eyebrow. As far as he knew, the Yugakure wasn't a ninja village. That wasn't the odd part. The odd part was the Yugakure hiring them. They had barely had any contact with the Hidden Leaf village.

Tsunade continued, "Usually, this wouldn't be a problem, but it's more complicated. As you two know, or you at least know, Nara, the Yugakure doesn't have ninja. Or, at least, they didn't. They do now. They're forming new ninja clans, building shinobi schools, and instituting new everything, basically. They are also rising in power. Do you know what this means? We have a chance to ally ourselves with them."

Naruto, who had been fighting to keep still, asked, "Well, that's cool. What's the problem, Baa-chan?"

Tsunade twitched, but managed not to give Naruto a third bruise. "The problem, brat, is that the Kage, the new Kage, has a problem. He has information that there will be an assassination attempt on his daughter, and he doesn't know who to trust in his own country. He does, however, trust me, and by extension, he trusts the ninja I trust. Now, he believes that his daughter will be assassinated on her birthday, and he needs two ninja to come and protect her. They need to be able to blend in, to pretend to be friends of his daughter. She's around your age, and that's the problem."