I'll never be the same.

I was thirteen.

Why did i withstand it,
I was 13, young enough to know the act,
But not old enough to feel it.
But he took it as a challenge,
He grabbed my waist in his hands,
And pulled me taught against his waistband.
I was 13, and asleep, he wanted some fun,
But I wake up to feel the cold, this is not fun.

My momma now questions her trust for me,
As I "accuse" a man of raping me,
I was 13, they test my morals and recount the act, it's okay, I'm still in tact.
I promise my momma I didn't lie, as I look her directly in the eye, a tear forms on her cheek, I think I might die.

This pain that I feel inside of me, the ostracism of my family, the broken pieces that won't reconnect, from what happened when I was 13.

The night I got violated, the years got more complicated, my family falling apart more and more, I beg my lucky stars that one day my family won't be broken anymore.

I was 13 when I felt the pain, when I grew 7 years in a space of a fully moon, carrying my family on my back like a mule, "it's okay mum I'm fine" I fake a smile. My emotional toil no one understands, because my childhood was taken away from me.

I'm now 16, but mentally 30, I'm tired of hiding my past and my journey.saving for the humiliation of my family, my story is relevant and needs to be told, so another 13 year old doesn't have to go unheard.