Unfaithful (On Hold)

Chapter 5

Serena

I lean my head back, sighing and stretching while pulled over. I needed a break, to just think and to run for a couple minutes before I go back on the road. The East Pack is certainly far away from my pack, but the farther away from the memories the better.

I never thought that my life would end up like this. Never before in my life. As cliché as it sounds, I always thought I'll be with Philip for the rest of our lives. That's what the Moon intended, isn't it? I thought we would have started our own family and be happy to watch them grow. But things don't work out the way you think. People hurt you. Some without knowing and some without any cares. Some don't even notice that they hurt you and you can never tell them. ( Sorry about the last sentence, I've just experienced some things and it just came out. Continue.) Love is something that can easily lift you up and feel as if the world is on your side and can't ever let you down. But it does. All time. It drops you slightly and then catches you again, like a game. And then eventually the game is over and the world drops you completely. That's what love is and that's what happened to me.

Will I ever love again? Of course I will, I may be a werewolf but I still am somewhat human and will find love again. Maybe not romantic love, but I will always find love again for others. I have to if I'm joining a new pack and want to be accepted into the pack. But I know there's always going to be underlining issues. And I'm going to have to solve them, to fix myself and be open once again.
                    
                                         ***
Entering the East Pack, is like a whole new world to me. I've come here, for diplomatic reasons of course but I've never had to stay longer than a week here. And now it's my life. It's surreal saying that, about a pack I've only seen a couple times a year. I step outside and take a deep breath in. The air smells different, not as clean the my home pack, the North Pack. But that pack may have been home in the beginning but now it's not. And maybe it'll never be home again.

I wait, rapping my foot against the ground. My bags are out and my trunk is open, waiting for wolves to come and smell, to make sure I'm not carrying anything hazardous. Moon knows that I'm not trying to start a war that'll never end. That happened to the West and South Pack. They continue to fight today, not really knowing why but they do. They blindly follow their orders and hate each other, but I never knew why. I will never know or find out. I'm not joining their pack and I never will.

The bowls of wolves disturb my thought process and I stand straighter, wanting my new pack's approval. Wolves are social animals and want to belong and help each other with the raising of pups. A man appears, with dark skin and dark brown almost black eyes. I feel his aura, telling me that he's an Alpha. My new Alpha. I bow my head slightly, showing him respect and he growls, loving that I'm giving him respect.

"You must be Serena. Welcome to the your new home, the East Pack."
***
Getting used to my new pack hasn't been easy, moving is never easy. I've been putting my things away and not really leaving my home, a recently built cottage. Wolves, especially she- wolves love having their own space. A space where she could get used to and move things to her liking. That's another reason why the pack hasn't come by, they want me to get used to my new home.

Have I, you may be asking? Well in all honesty, hell no! Moon if I knew it was this hard I wouldn-no. I can't regret this. I can't go back. This is my new life. I don't need him. As sadistic it is, he's mostly like dead. He has nothing to live for. That's how it is for werewolves. Once you do the ceremony, the rejected always dies. As tragic and cruel as it is, that's the life the Moon has given us. There's nothing we could do about it. Except love your mates. Too bad I couldn't get that.

A knock on the door disturbs my thoughts and I quickly move to the door, not wanting to leave the person out there. I stand by the door and take a deep breath in, opening it slowly. I see a male standing before me. I don't sense much power from him, so he must be a regular wolf or maybe a training warrior. He's cute though.

"Hi. I'm Lucas and it's nice to meet you Serena. I'm just here to check on you, see if you need any help whatsoever."

"No, I'm fine. Thank you so much Lucas. Now I know this might come off as rude but can I be alone for a little bit? I want to get used to my new surroundings."

Lucas smiles and nods his head, slowly closing the door for me. I take a breath and lean my head against the door. This is what my life has led up to? I don't have a mate and it's near impossible for me to have pups without my mate. Us wolves mate for life, unless the Moon decides you're worth the chance for you to get a second mate. But that stopped happening decades ago. So I'm alone for the rest of my miserable life. No I can't think like that. I'm stronger than those thoughts. I just need hope.

But hope for what?
•••
Wow I can't believe I came back to this. I've been so focused on my senior year and colleges (I've been accepted into 3 but not my dream college yet) that I kinda forgot about this book. But I've decided to come back and I'm shocked about how many reads I've gotten. Like wow you want to read my book? You want to read a book from a 18 year old? It's just so shocking and I'm so happy about that. I want to come back and finish this book before graduation, which is in June. God this will be fun to write in only about 3 months.

But thank you so much for this. I'm in a better mindset than when I was originally writing this chapter since the guy who broke my heart is toxic and is now blocked and removed from my life. I can't wait to continue with this book!