The Paragon

Chapter Fifteen

"Aelvine." I looked up to see Phoenix standing in the doorway of the training room. "You want to go to Aelvine?"

"Nice to see you," I said dryly, looking back at the tiny ball of energy I was manipulating and shaping in my hands. The whole thing crackled with compressed power; it wasn't exactly easy to maintain in such a small shape. "Welcome back."

"Imagine my surprise this morning when I received a communication telling me to be prepared for travel to Aelvine within the next few weeks," Phoenix continued. "Naturally, at first I assumed it was a mistake and someone had simply forgotten I would of course be staying with the Paragon, here in the fortress where she is training."

"Phoenix," I sighed, gritting my teeth a bit as I struggled to maintain control.

"But no, actually, the trip is entirely for the Paragon, in order for her to travel and meet allies despite my objections to this that I have already made clear to her. I leave you alone for one day, Imogen, and you start thinking that perhaps my opinion doesn't matter anymore? Is that it?"

"Enough!" I shouted, letting the ball in my hands free. The energy expanded and, unfortunately, bounced back at me rather than simply dissipating. I stumbled backwards, landing on the ground hard.

Phoenix was in front of me in a flash. "Are you all right?" he asked, his face changed from a look of anger to one of worry.

"Yeah, I'm fine," I said, brushing away the hand that he offered to pull me up. "You messed with my concentration by scolding me like a disobedient child."

Jaw clenching, I saw a bit of the anger return to Phoenix's face. "Well, thank you for proving my point more," he said. "You need more training before you go anywhere."

"I can't stay here forever, Phoenix."

"You also don't need to go so soon."

"The council thinks that I should visit our allies up north. I know you don't like the idea."

"You're right," Phoenix said. "I don't like it at all. It's dangerous."

"It's going to be just as dangerous later," I told him, repeating the words that the council had fed to me. "Maybe even more so. I need to make connections now." Phoenix ran his hand through his hair, frustrated. "Phoenix, this is what you wanted, wasn't it? For me to be Paragon?"

"People can want things and not like them," he replied, staring at some point on the floor beside me instead of meeting my eyes. "I want the Paragon, yes, because I'm a Redcloak. And I prompted you to accept your position more fully, I know I did. But to see the council moving this along so fast..." Phoenix's eyes closed, as though he were fighting against some inner pain. "I don't want to see you in danger."

"Well, I'll tell you a secret: I don't want to be in danger," I said. "But apparently I don't get a choice about that anymore. Instead, I have to figure out when are the least dangerous times for me to do what I have to do. I'm doing my best to follow the council's instructions and to be the Paragon that they want. And that means that I have to be in danger. Trust me, it's just as scary for me as it is for you."

"You're scared," Phoenix repeated, his eyes coming up to meet mine. He didn't seem to be asking a question, though his expression seemed inquisitive.

"Of course I'm scared," I replied, hearing my voice rise in frustration. "I'm scared all the time. I feel like I'm pretending to have control over this, but one wrong move and it'll all be ripped away. I wasn't meant for this, Phoenix, no matter how much you might believe it."

Phoenix ran a hand over his face, his eyes squinting shut as he clearly struggled with this conversation in his mind. "Immy, I don't want anything to happen to you," he said.