You Are My Sunshine (BxB)

8:Hurricane

Was choking in the crowd,
Building my rain up in the cloud,
Falling like ashes to the ground,
Hoping my feelings, they would drown.....       

🌻🌻🌻

I kissed Nikko Kim.
His lips were soft. The kiss radiated the kindness and love in his heart. It was amazing.
     I felt happy.

        I kissed Nikko Kim.
He's a guy and I'm not very sure about my sexuality. I'm a renowned boxer. I don't want to spoil my father's reputation.
I felt sad.

    
       All my emotions were bottled up inside me. And I just wanted all my feelings to evacuate my body, leave me alone for a minute.

       I am miserable. My heart was aching and my head was heavy.

      Crying wasn't helping, nor was boxing.

       There was a hurricane of emotions inside me. Sadness, happiness, contentment, love, anger, hate...... And worst of all guilt.

        I want the hurricane to abate.
     I just want my emotions to drown.
     I want to feel numb.
     If nothing, I want my body to explode.

~~~

      I needed to clear my mind so I decided to go for a walk.

      The music was blasting through my ears. I pulled up my hood and started walking.

       Everything around me was a blur. My head was light and dizzy. And I was literally walking where my feet were taking me without thinking.

           My ears were aching due to the loudness of music but I didn't turn down the volume. It felt good.

         My feet were hurting as I was slamming my feet on the street while walking. But I didn't slow down. It felt good.

          I got away from the crowd and starting running. I was out of breath but I didn't stop. I was going wild. But again, It felt good.

         So I ran till I found myself standing in front of a familiar building, my training centre— NYC Boxing Academy.

        I walked in. The familiar smell of sweat and noise of grunts filled the air.

       A hand was placed on my shoulder and even before I turned around, I knew who it was.

     "Hey Raphael!" I greeted my trainer. Raphael not only taught me boxing but also cheered me up when I was low. He is great at giving advice.

     "Jullian, my man. What brings you here early today."

      "Nothing. I was missing this place. Thought I'll come here."

     "Good. There are some big tournaments coming up. You can practice more."

      "HEY JULLIAN!!"

        As I turned around, I saw Matthew, Raphael's assistant.
Raphael and I started training almost together. He's a few years elder to me. We've always  been good friends.

      "Hey buddy. How you doin?" I asked.

    "I'm good."

    Matt and I indulged in a small conversation but he had to go train some new comers.

     We were silently watching other boxers fight untill Raphael decided to speak-
"Jullian, everything alright?"

"Yeah everything fine. Just thinking if I am ready to start boxing in tournaments." I lied.

" It't nothing that you haven't done before. You will do great Jullian. You are the most passionate and hard working person I know."

"Thanks Raphael."

"I believe in you." Raphael said while patting my back.

       I felt a lot better. Until it was night and my thoughts evaded my head.
        I went to my boxing room and started punching the punching bag to let out all my emotions.