The Trevor Lifeline (LGBTQ Helpline) | ONGOING

✆ call #2

Devi || Leo

"Hello, Trevor Lifeline, this is Devi speaking, how may I help you?"

"...I can't believe I'm doing this."

"Oh? Why's that?"

"Because...I've spent so many years suffering that I've accepted that dying is the only way I can be happy. I shouldn't waste your time."

"Why are those your only two options? Die or suffer?"

"..."

"Tell me about your life, and who you are."

"My name is Leo...I'm a Korean-American in the closet."

"...Oh..."

"...Yeah. My entire town is very, very homophobic...so I risk losing all the friends and family I have if anyone finds out my secret."

"..."

"I've been told my entire life that gays are an abomination and are all going to hell, so yeah, you can understand why I don't have very high hopes for my future."

"But if you end your life, you'll never know what amazing things you could do in the future. All the things you've worked for your whole life will be left unfinished."

"Don't you understand? I've worked my whole life to make other people happy. I'm currently studying to be a surgeon so I can show my parents that Im not a fuck-up and that I can be succesful like my siblings. I played sports all through school because I was sick of getting bullied for being a weak little Asian kid. I act like a total jackass because on top of hiding my sexuality, I had to give up a lot of my interests because they were 'gay.' Everything I am is to please others."

"..."

"And I can't even hang out with any guys or go on dates or do anything because gossip spreads through this damn town faster than the black plague."

"That's terrible, Leo, I'm really sorry. I know exactly what you're going through."

"Really?"

"Yes. Asian families typically don't say this, so let me be the first to say, that being queer is okay. Who you choose to kiss doesn't change your value as a person and it sure as hell doesn't define your entire personality."

"...Thanks."

"Mhm. Would've been nice to hear it growing up, but hey, I can't change the past. I can only make the future better for someone else."

"You said you know how I feel...are you..."

"Well, yeah, I'm also a queer Asian. My parents were not thrilled when I came out. But they're fine now."

"...How did you get them to change their mind?"

"It was just something new that they didn't understand, but once they see that their child is still the same, they'll be fine. Trust me."

"Maybe your parents chose having a queer child over no child, but I'm not sure my parents will do the same. They can afford to disown me, they have other children."

"Well, I can't speak for other people. The important thing is, you should come out when you're ready. And I can promise you that outside of your town, people will barely care about your sexuality."

"..."

"Your town can't speak for the rest of the world, Leo. Generally, people worry more about rising gas prices than they do about dudes kissing dudes."

"You think so?"

"I know so. Find people who support you for you. I say this to pretty much everyone who calls, but there are lots of people like us out there and the internet is the easiest way to connect with them."

"...Okay."

"Remember, that everything you're going through will end. There is nothing wrong with you, and you deserve a normal, happy life just like everyone else."

"Thanks, Devi. Seriously."

"You're welcome, Leo. If you ever need to talk again, remember that we'll always be here to listen or to give you advice."

"I'll keep that in mind. Bye, Devi."

"Bye Leo."

***Click***