A Piece of Me

2014...In a More Detailed Light

I felt alive again

I was still dead but the feeling of grabbing the shards of grass was there

Then you happened

You feel like spring

Mainly because that's when we met

You feel like the only life in March

I was holding the stars with you every day in my mind in my 5th-period study hall

I was dreaming about you even in the summer

I didn't dream about you as much in the summer because you feel like summer itself too

You feel like a warm April day while I wear my sea-green dress

As it flows in the wind with the windows down

As my father grabs his monster

And my stepmother turns on the radio to where it plays "Am I Wrong"

And you feel like that reassuring warm air,

That blows in my face and rushes through each loose strand of my hair,

They all whisper your name,

And dream of you when the wind stops,

You feel like the anticipation I felt to stand next to you,

The hope I feel to get to know you better,

The strong hope I had to speak your name whilst I stood next to you that 10th time, 

You make my body feel as the rain does, 

As it slams against my windowpane,

Calm and snug,

And waiting for you to appear in my dreams again,

Where we hold hands on the gearshift, 

Or you're waiting for me on the ferry dock, 

As that same wind that blew in my hair that day, 

Blows through both of our heads, 

And whispers a sweet song of familiarity, 

That familiarity where my soul knows yours and it knows mine, 

And it tells us both that we are right where we're meant to be, 

All this time, 

Even after 5 years, 

You feel like how we all felt when "Wake Me Up" by Avicii came on the radio,

Light yet full,

You feel like everything I've been holding in finally let go,

You feel like that 45-degree night in Painesville looking at the stars while standing against my car,

You feel like a safe place,

Your arms are the warmest I ever was,

2014 was the good year,

2017 was the bad year,

But maybe 2019 can be our best year,

We've come so far,

From my writing about imploding on Wattpad,

To you telling me that you want me to spend the night with you,

I wish I could've,

It would've been wonderful for us,

Then 2017 would've been our year,

So maybe,

Just maybe,

You can feel like home again,

And I can feel safe yet exuberant again.