Butterfly Effect || BTS Universe

Illuminate

The Boy Who Played With Fire

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A sharp pain shot up his finger and to his hand. He continued to hover his finger above the flame. The new and old burn scars bubbled from his skin. He didn't care. It was all numb now.

The nerve endings barely sparked any pain to his body as he continued his actions. They were practically frayed from how often he would do this. He watched the flame dance over his digit and flicker around in the dim room. The lights hadn't fully worked for years. He never bothered to get them fixed.

His eyes scan the room for any difference. The crumbling wallpaper was still flaking off, the gentle caress of the A/C unit pushing more of it off the wall. He didn't bother cleaning up the growing pile of paper anymore. Creaks and groans from the beams sounded above with every step from the residents above. The walls were as thin as his patience, they didn't conceal anything.

The lighter clicked close and he sat up. The springs screamed at him as he adjusted himself. Damp air filled his empty lungs and left with a large exhale. It tasted the same: bitter loneliness mixed with a hint of stale pathetic depression. He was pitiful. One swipe through his hair let the grease coating his fingers tell him the same. He sighed again.

He tossed the lighter on the mattress and stood, shrieking springs praising the loss of weight on the poor bed. The mirror in front of him held photos stuck in the frame. He pulled one free.

Jungkook.

One more sigh. It was taken almost a year ago. Back when everything was fine.

When Jungkook was the youngest yet most passionate of the seven of them. When Jimin still had that bright spark in his eye. When Hoseok carried the weight of everyone's happiness with ease. When Namjoon and Taehyung didn't care about their own situations, they just enjoyed their moments with the rest of them.

And when Yoongi and the eldest of them still appreciated the life they were given.

Everything was so much easier then. Why did it have to change? Why did it have the make a turn for the worst?

He stared at the photo for the longest time. A million thoughts ran through his head, but only one was the loudest. So, he crumbled the photo in his hand.

. . .

Yoongi wasn't one to trust. It took him a while to become comfortable with people. So, it was considered a miracle when he had six other boys that he felt the title 'family' wouldn't even come close to describing them In the years that he had known them, he learned more about himself and how it was like to interact and actually understand others. They all came from different backgrounds, had different beliefs and passions. Yet, they still stuck together.

One boy, in particular, managed to make Yoongi room for him in his heart. The youngest boy looked up to him in a way that had Yoongi believe that he had to give him the world that he deserved. Having been one of the oldest in the group, it was only natural that he took him under his wing and cared for him as an older brother would. His desire to be like Yoongi and learn the things he knew had him hold the boy closer to his heart.

What he didn't prepare was the inevitable destruction of his mind. And with how close Jungkook was to him, it would bring him down as well. Yoongi tried to stop it, even doing so much as trying to tear out that safe place in his heart he had reserved for Jungkook. But the boy cared too much. He watched his friend destroy himself and look a little too longingly at the flame that always flickered betwixt his fingers. He wanted to stop him, to bring him a different light that the flames wouldn't give him.

But when he learned that Yoongi's mother succumbed to those same flames, it dragged him down to the place that Jungkook knew he could never pull him out. Yoongi made absolutely sure that Jungkook couldn't. He found solace in that pit of despair and let the curling smoke clog his airways and fog his mind.

He found no sense of reason and purpose. He lashed out at Jungkook just for the sake of making him hate him. It would be easier that way. Everyone was wary of Yoongi and tried not to disturb him as he isolated himself. They knew even one twitch would set him off and he would explode. Jungkook was the only one who took those chances.

And in doing so, it tore him apart to the point where he wanted Yoongi to lash out at him. It was the only way he knew he still cared. That he used his energy to take it out on him.

It still didn't stop Yoongi from burning his very own soul.

Jungkook was devastated. Smoke clogged his lungs for days as he waited for Yoongi's condition to improve. Slight burns covered his hands, caused by the flames that tickled his skin while he was dragging Yoongi's body out of the flaming room. When Yoongi was released from the hospital, the first thing he did was drag himself to Jungkook's house and demand why he thought it was okay to save him.

Jungkook was baffled and it only infuriated Yoongi more. He screamed, cried and cursed Jungkook for not letting him join his mother. Yoongi believed that the first swing of Jungkook's fist was what truly broke the bond they both had.

With Jungkook on the floor, Yoongi screaming at the top of his lungs in frustration, some would think they had finally reached insanity. That wouldn't even begin to describe it. Yoongi grabbed the nearest object, it being a chair, and put all of his energy into throwing it in the mirror. Jungkook didn't even blink.

Yoongi didn't know when it happened. Was it during his walk away from Jungkook? Or was it during the time he spent in the hotel room? He had no clue. But, Yoongi knew he had to try again. He was successful in finally removing Jungkook from him, the lost and helpless look in his eyes that he caught before he had stormed off. He needed to leave. He couldn't be here anymore.

What was one more death in the group going to do?

. . .

The distasteful scent of gasoline burned the lining of his nostrils with every inhale. Yoongi welcomed it. As soon as the liquid finally emptied from the canister, he tossed it with reckless abandon onto the bed. He made sure the door was locked this time. The toxic smell clouded his mind and it only heightened his desire to fully close it off for good. He pocketed the lighter and made his way over to the window. No way was he going to let anything get out.

With the click of the lock signaling it was fully shut, Yoongi smiled. Something tapped the window and he glanced up to see a strange butterfly land on the outside window seal. He stared at it for a moment. It's blue and black wings moved languidly as it seemed to be staring back at Yoongi. Something washed over him. An ominous feeling that caused the skin on his arms to perk up and a shiver to cruise down his spine. Before he could think about it, the butterfly took off. The dirty streetlights did nothing to show Yoongi where it flew off to.

He took a careful step back and turned away from the window. He didn't look back.

The lighter weighed heavily in his pocket the longer he thought about it. The gasoline made his head hazy and his senses seem disembodied. Any sound he made sounded foreign like he was in another dimension. His diminished motor functions made it difficult for him to get the lighter out. Once he did, he instantly flicked it on. The air around the flame popped and crackled as it began to dance wildly. Without a second thought, he tossed it onto the bed. Instantaneously, flames sprouted up from the lines of gasoline and grew in seconds.

Yoongi felt the heat barely grazing his skin. He welcomed it. He watched with tired eyes as the flames began to consume most of the walls. The drywall crumbled under the heat and exposed the structure behind it.

Flames licked at his ankles and fingertips. Yoongi just stood there. He wasn't sure what would kill him first, the smoke that was starting to conceal the room or the burning of the fire. Regardless, he could feel the cascade of his mind as it shut down, the ringing in his ears louder than it has ever been. Tunnel-vision made it hard for him to focus. He couldn't feel his muscles, but he knew he was smiling.

The last thing he heard was the faint wail of sirens and the eventual crumble of the walls as he fell with them, the fire finally eroding away the foundation until it was nothing. And as he was falling, his smile never left. Yoongi welcomed the new, light feeling as the numb burning from the flames disappeared along with his conscious.