Caught in Between

-7-

It was finally the weekend, and I was excited. I was waiting all week for the weekend to come and it arrived. My happiness soon faded when I realized that a week from now, it would be the anniversary of my father's death. I laid in bed with all my limbs spread out and I closed my eyes. I couldn't help but suddenly miss him. Normally, I would feel more sad and depressed when it was around his anniversary, but this time, I was just okay.

It wasn't that I missed him to the point where I was sad, I just wanted him to be here to hold me in his arms, or to tell me his lame and awful dad jokes again. I wanted him to take me bowling like he always had, or sit down and watch sports together. I never cared which sports he was watching, all I cared about was watching it with him. I let out a sigh as I rolled myself off my bed.

I had to change and get ready for today. I was supposed to go buy a new dress to wear next week when I go to visit my father's grave. For his first anniversary, the week before we went to visit him, I bought a new dress and I donated my other dress that I wore to his funeral. I wanted to think of it as letting go of my past grievances. His second anniversary, I bought a new dress and then got rid of the one I wore to his first anniversary. This year was his third.

I walked to my closet and I pulled out my dress from last year. I believed that my dress system worked. Every year, I felt slightly better than the previous one. I was slowly moving on and letting go of all the pain that once consumed and controlled me.

My phone dinged and I set the dress down on my bed as I moved toward my nightstand. I unplugged the charging cord from my phone and I sat down on my bed as I pulled up the message. It was from Keith. He put me in a group with him and Kaleb.

Keith: Hey, are you free today?

Kaleb: I miss you already, let's go do something together.

Me: I'll be free more toward the evening.

Keith: How about a movie night?

Me: Oh, that sounds nice. What movie?

Kaleb: We have a nice home theater set up, so we could do it at our place. :)

Keith: Whatever movie you want, we have a huge selection to choose from.

Me: I'll take a look when I'm over there.

Kaleb: Just text us when ur ready later, we'll go pick you up.

Me: Kk.

Keith: Be safe, please.

Kaleb: What he said. If anyone's bothering you, just give us a call and we'll be there in a jiff to beat the shit outta them.

I smiled as I set aside my phone. Even texting them made me happy. I changed into dark blue jeans, a tank top that I wore underneath a light gray fuzzy wool sweater. To match my fuzzy theme, I wore bright tie-dye fuzzy socks. I picked out my cream colored wool coat that had a tie for the waist and then I set aside brown leather boots that reached just under my knee and it had a metal heel that was a shiny gold color.

I left my bedroom so I could freshen up in the bathroom. I gasped as soon as I saw myself in the mirror. My love bites that Keith left me are still there, but they were started to lighten in color. I washed my face, brushed my teeth and then I threw my hair up in a bun. Since my mother had work today, I was able to go down to the kitchen with ease without worrying about her seeing my neck.

From the freezer, I took out a pack of frozen chocolate chip waffles and I grabbed three individually and placed them in the toaster oven and turned the knob. I put back the pack and I closed the freezer door. I removed the bottle of pure maple syrup from my fridge and I placed it on the counter by the toaster oven. I grabbed a plate and a fork and also placed those beside the toaster oven. I jogged back upstairs to grab my phone, my coat, my boots, a scarf and a pair of gloves from my room and then I came downstairs again. I left all my stuff in the living room except my phone before I walked into the kitchen to wait for my waffles to be done.