The door to my apartment slammed open, illuminating the pitch black space in front of it. Quickly, two sets of unsteady legs walked backwards into the darkness, shutting the door behind them, completely intertwined with one another. Being one of the unsteady legs, I was guided by the other set towards my kitchen. This mysterious mass in front of me, guiding my every movements, hands placed firmly on my hips. We were kissing furiously, the kind of kisses you give when saying goodbye for a long time. Every so often the mass before me would break our kiss and travel down my neck and shoulders.
"Austin.."
I managed to get out in between our kisses. He pressed against me harder to silence me. With his hands still on my hips, he lowered them to my ass and hoisted me onto my kitchen counter, The back of my head being pushed against my cabinets. Austin broke our kiss and pressed his head against my forehead.
"Why do I always have to track you down?"
He kissed me one more time, I stayed silent.
"I don't get it. You're so easy to find, but so hard to message. And then when I do find you, we still fuck like we've waited forever for it. But when I'm just trying to talk to you, you're MIA."
I tried to silence him with another kiss, but he pushed me away from him.
So it's true. That very last time that me and Austin decided we were going to give this a shot. The very next night he texted me for the first time and I completely disregarded it. Not that I wanted to, it's just what my instinct told me to do. Austin would return a couple months later, find me, meet up with me, and we'd have sex like we do. And then Austin will ask me why I ignored him. And I'd either say nothing or just come up with some lousy excuse.
"I'm sorry"
I kissed Austin again to change the subject one last time. His hands pressed onto my hips to tear me away from him.
"No, Mel. You told me we were going to give this a shot. I can't keep coming to find you like this."
I stared back at him.
Austin has come to NY about 13 times since what happened. At first, it would be only when he had a concert near NYC, but the past few times he's come a couple weeks apart. This time it had only been a week since the last time.
Austin continued.
"And not that I don't love coming and fucking the shit out of you, I'm also trying to get to know you. I want this to be bigger. And everytime we share a night like this, that feeling only gets stronger."
I blushed and bit my lip.
"I do want that. I just can't shake this feeeling."
I started to trail off, but I cut myself short and fixed myself up, grabbing the collar of Austin's shirt.
"It's better this way anyways! You don't have to worry about me getting jealous when you hook up on tour. You've got freedom. You can do whatever you want"
I smiled and began to kiss his neck. One of Austin's hands snaked to the side of my face and gently pushed my head away from him and made me look at him.
"Mel.."
I gulped, I couldn't handle this confrontation.
He kissed my forehead.
"..I don't feel like I can do whatever I want because I want to be with you."
I stared back at him with wide eyes. He kept the same stone expression. His hand dropped from my cheek and he backed away from the counter. I pushed myself to the edge of my counter.
"But it's better this way. There's no commitment, you don't have to worry about me while you're off."
He chuckled to himself.
"Mel, I'm currently doing a tour on the west coast and I'm here in NYC because I wanted to see you. I have a show in Seattle tomorow night. Obviously you're on my mind."
I wrapped my arms around his neck and sighed.
"I don't know if I'm ready to date you.."
Austin stared back at me with a look of disbelief.
"Are you serious?"
I nodded.
"It's just that, it's not like you're just anyone y'know? Dating you comes with more than just you. Paparazzi. Crazy fans. I don't know if I want to deal with that.."
Austin nodded his head slowly, listening to me intently.
"It doesn't have to be exclusive yet.. We could start slow and just keep things like this. I know how to get to you stealthily."
I smirked and chuckled.
"Then why are we complicating things by putting a label on this? If things are going to remain the same?"
He placed a firm hand on my thigh, leaning towards me to kiss up my neck.
"Because I want you to be my girl."
"Austin, shut up, you don't"
He broke his kiss away from my neck and stared at me seriously.
"I think I should leave."
