🗸 the quintessences of cherry & cigarette

3.5: "promise me"

Dialing

Cherry

//call received//

Devin: Why are you crying?

Cerise: What...? Am not... you're in the library?

Devin: Yeah, but that's not important. What's wrong, Cherry? Who hurt you?

Cerise: No one... I just-- it just... there's-- [sobs]

Devin: Hey, hey... it's going to be okay. It's all gonna be alright.

Cerise: [sniffling, swallows] Yeah... yeah, okay. I can make it alright. I can fix this.

Devin: [worriedly] What are you--

Cerise: I just gotta find out why everyone hates me. Then, I can change myself to be more likable.

Devin: What?! Fuck no! Cherry, are you even listening to yourself? [indignantly] You're not fucking changing yourself for the sake of other people.

Cerise: Why? That's how it works. That's my solution.

Devin: I don't care. And that's not how it works. No matter what you do, people are always going to find some fault or another with you... and... and this is fucking stupid! Never, ever change yourself for the sake of cunts and assholes.

Cerise: Oh, right! [annoyed] Everything is so easy for you to say like a pep talk, because you're not living a life where you're hated by everyone.

Devin: You know nothing about the life I live. But let me tell you, I live with a lot of hatred, too. It's not all unicorns and rainbows for me, it never was. And you know what, I don't fucking care about it because it doesn't. Fucking. Matter!

Cerise: [softly] Then what does matter...?

Devin: Nothing, really...

Cerise: It's not that simple... I-- I can't deal with things the way you do. I'm not like you.

Devin: And I'm not asking you to be like me. I'm only asking you to not care about others' opinions about you because that holds little to no significance in your life. People's opinions and behaviors don't shape your life, you do. People are fucking fucktards.

Cerise: Everything ultimately leads to humans being loathsome creatures with you... [laughs] God, it's like you're the lovechild of Hitler gay-ing around with Satan.

Devin: Ha ha, hilarious.

Cerise: [giggles] What? I'm a very funny person.

Devin: Mmm... [clicks tongue] that's pretty debatable. But... stay this way, okay?

Cerise: Okay...

Devin: This is your life, Cerise, and no one else's. You're your own person, not Loralie's or Jenny's or Elijah's or anyone else's. You owe it to yourself to live your life the way you want to, be the person which you internally are. You hear me?

Cerise: Yeah...

Devin: Promise me, you won't change yourself to fit in with the stupid conventions of this fucked up society?

Cerise: ... I promise.

Devin: Good.

//quietude lapses//

Cerise: Hey, Cigarette?

Devin: Yeah, right here...

Cerise: You think everyone hates you. That's not true... [tentatively] I don't hate you.

Devin: [chuckles] I'm glad you don't, despite how I started out with you...

Cerise: Forgiven and forgotten.

Devin: Thank you. If it's any comfort, I don't hate you either, Cherry. I actually quite like you.

Cerise: Oh...

//passing silence//

Devin: Okay, Cherry. I've gotta go now. Class. Talk to you later?

Cerise: Sure, okay. Bye.

//call disconnected//

***

Dialing

Cigarette

//call received//

Cerise: Hey, are you busy?

Devin: Not really. What's up?

Cerise: Just wanna ask you something--today's question. It can't wait, I must ask it now, because I can't concentrate on work with it on my mind, please, may I ask it now? Also, it's not like I'm looking for any validation or anything from you, I just really want to know... [deeply inhales]

Devin: Christ, that's a lot of words in one breath...

Cerise: [still winded] Yeah, sorry about that. Now, may I...?

Devin: [jokingly] Well, that's already one question.

Cerise: Argh! No... not this one. Please let me ask you another question!

Devin: [laughs] Of course, go ahead.

Cerise: What do you like about me?

Devin: Huh...?

Cerise: You said you liked me. What's it about me that you find so likable?

Devin: I... uh. I... well, it's just--

Cerise: Never mind. [rants] Dumb question. Sorry I asked. Forget I asked. God, I'm so stupid. I'm sorr--

Devin: I like your hair, I like how long it is, longer than anyone else's. And I like your eyes, I've never seen eyes as dark as yours...

Cerise: [surprised, mute]

Devin: [continuing more confidently] I like how strong you are, as a person, and I like how hard you work at Matheson's. I like how soft-spoken you are, and I like the shape of your face, and the way everything you wear seems a bit too big for you... I like-- I like how you look tiny and fragile, but how strong and tenacious and... and perseverant you contrarily are. I like how immersed you get in poetry and history... I, uh... are you there?

Cerise: [jolts] Oh, yeah. Yes. I gotta go...

Devin: Wha--

//call disconnected//

***