The Littlest Malfoy Lost

Ch. 16 Masked Pain

The next morning I woke to a loud conversation downstairs. I grabbed a tight black dress that had a train that dragged behind me. I pulled that dress on before making my way to the room where I heard the noise. I paused seeing the Muggle studies teacher floating above the table. My lips parted in shock. What was happening and why? I stared at the Professor unmoving unable you look away.

"Isabelle," my mother murmured as I began to move approaching her slowly not taking my eyes off the Professor.

"Thought I should see what was going on," I said sitting in the open seat between my mother and the Dark lord. My mother took my hand in hers as the Dark Lord glanced at me with concern. He was worried how I would take what was to happen. Tom only waited a moment before continuing what he was doing despite my presence. He knew I would refuse to leave and he also knew I would want him to continue despite my presence.

"This woman is the one who suggested pureblood children needed to be raised by muggles. Because of her I believe Dumbledore decided to take Ms. Isabelle to the orphanage," Tom said with anger. I looked down at the table away from the teacher. Tears brimmed my eyes but didn't fall as everything came crashing down around me. Pain filled my chest as images flashed through my mind of every punishment given to me by the woman running the orphanage. My grasp on my mother's hand tightened subconsciously as I fought against the memories streaming through my body. The images didn't stop until Tom continued to speak. "For that reason she will be severely punished!"

"Severus. We are friends," she sobbed but Severus looked at her with a harsh gaze. Tom chuckled before sending the killing curse hurtling towards the Muggle studies teacher. Her blank eyes stared at me as she dropped onto the table with a thud that made me flinch. My mother got up pulling me from the room quickly. She wasted no time as she decided that I wasn't ready to see what just happened. The last thing I heard before the doors shut was Tom telling Nagini to eat.

"Isabelle," she whispered seconds before a tear fell down my cheek. "Are you okay?"

"I'm sorry I'm such a wimp it's just watching that and having Tom mention the orphanage brought back some memories," I whispered softly. She wiped the tear away gently.

"Do you want to talk about it?" She asked as I looked up into her kind blue eyes.

"Not here," I said softly as I looked up into her kind understanding eyes. She put her hand on my back leading me to my room. She casted a silencing spell so no one would hear what was said. I took a shaky breath before I looked back at my mom. I didn't want to tell her but I knew I couldn't keep this from her. "Tom grew up at the same orphanage and while they were harsh to him what I went through was more intense. I accidentally saw what Tom went through by reading his mind and it was awful but they knew what I was the moment I was left there whereas he had several years where the people didn't know. I was an outcast. They rarely fed me and if they did it was burnt or rotten. I was expected to take care of everything and everyone. If I didn't meet expectations which I never did I receive a beating."

I watched my mother carefully as I spoke seeing a deep sadness in her blue eyes. I waited for her to fully process what I said.

"How bad did they hurt you?" She asked me her voice quivering with emotions. I almost couldn't bare to tell her as my heart clenched but I looked at her face and knew that keeping her in the dark would drive her crazy so I told her the horrors of the orphanage. She had the right to know what happened to her little girl.

"Usually bruises, there were a few times I had cracked ribs. Once, the first time my magic showed itself, the lady who ran the orphanage came at me with a knife. She didn't cut me but sometimes I find myself picturing her attacking me and those I love in the way she did when I was little," I muttered weakly. My mother took me into her arms holding me close. "I think Dumbledore might have hurt me too." She stiffened pulling back to look me in the eyes questioning what I meant. "He used the Cruciatus curse on me when I was taken from the manor by Arthur. He then tried to erase the memory from my head but for some reason it didn't work. I think I had grown too powerful for his spell to work like it used to."

"You think he has done that before?" She asked her blue eyes pleaded for the answer to be no but also knowing that wasn't the truth. I nodded reluctantly as fire blazed to life in her blue eyes. She took my hand in hers before speaking. "I promise you that will never happen again!"

"I know mostly because I'm powerful enough to protect myself now," I told her softly. She continued to watch me as I hid my sadness behind a hard front. I could see how my pain harmed her and I refused to allow that to happen. "I should go back to the meeting." I said abruptly to end the conversation. My mother looked at me with sadness at what I was forced to go through. She didn't stop me as I left the room finding Tom standing alone in the meeting room.

"Are you alright?" His voice broke through the silence with a glance at me. His concern came from his knowledge of the cruel orphanage we both had lived through.

"I'm fine I just needed a second," I said my voice neutral causing him to face me. I could see a knowing pain in his eyes as he looked at my blank face.

"Don't hide your feelings or you will become me," he said softly. "That is why so many fear me. Fear is good but loyalty and love is better. I found that here but it took me longer than it should have." He told me.

"I won't," I said after a few moments. "I saw the pain in my mother's eyes as I told her the wounds inflicted on me at the orphanage and if I was emotional she would have broken down and I couldn't stand to see that."

"I understand your fears but she's stronger than anyone I know so trust her to be strong," he said walking towards me. I looked at the ground knowing he was right. "She can help Isa."

"I will," I said firmly looking into his eyes. After a few moments I shifted the topic. "Can I help?" I asked needing to feel like I was something other than broken.

"Of course. How do you feel about weddings?" He asked with a smirk. I sighed, I hated weddings.

Instead of telling Tom about my lack of desire to go to a wedding I said, "What do I have to do?"