Missed

Chapter 1 - Him

I could still see him. I could always see him. Even if he wasn't there, he was to me.

I didn't want him to be there. Why was he? I didn't want to see him anymore.

-

Sitting on my bed, my eyes darted around the room. My closet door was slightly open, and I tried not to but I couldn't help but look into the shadows, just incase I could see him. I couldn't. But I knew he was somewhere.
What if I did see him? What would I do? I couldn't forgive him. It was weird. I wanted him there but I didn't, at the same time. I don't know if it was my longing for him that made me feel him, or the fact that I wanted him to be there so badly that my mind and my thoughts were messing up. I don't know.

I brought my knees slowly up to my chest, and brought up a pillow for comfort. I buried my head into it, and although I tried to resist the temptation, I could feel my eyes tearing up. It had been three years since "that" night, and I still thought about him every single day. 
He kept his promise, even though I made it for him. I told him to go away, I said goodbye - he stayed away. I hadn't seen him in three whole years. I missed his face, I missed his presence - but even though I missed it, I could still feel him somehow.

"Violet," my mom said softly, not even startling me by her sudden entry into my room. I didn't answer her.
"Violet," she said, even more softly. "Please, Violet. Please talk to me. I miss you. I'm so sorry for what happened, but please, your dad and I.. we just want the old you back again."
I sniggered sarcastically. The old me?
"Mom. I'm dead. You're dead, dad's dead. The old me died three years ago. You'll never have the 'old me' back again."

Apart from my mom coming in every single day, I practically isolated myself from everyone and everything. Moira used to come in to talk to me, but I never talked back. She stopped trying after about 6 months.

"Violet, we just want to be a family again. Remember the year it happened? We celebrated Christmas together, we were happy. It was just like we were normal again."
"Yeah, mom, that was when we were still in shock to what fucking happened. I don't think any of us had actually processed that we were DEAD." I shouted the last word of my sentence. I didn't mean to be this angry, but I was. I was so angry at both myself, and him, and I was just so upset and just so.. so tired. She left. Every day, she tried to talk me out of my room. She tried everything - from trying to make me feel guilty to trying to make me happy, but nothing worked. I laughed at the thought of being happy again.

***

I kind of have a plan in my head of where I want to go with this fic, but anyhow this is the first one I've ever publicly posted! Feedback would be appreciated :) Thankyou!