NOT GIVING UP ON FOREVER

Chapter 60

She went out into the hall and plopped down on the sofa, stepping over the bottles. Thoughts swarmed through her mind. Teo didn't see the logic in her reaction, but Anna saw the situation in a very different light.

It was the last night before she could meet Randall, and she had to make up her mind to move on with Teo. And she couldn't do that. Silly? Yes. Cruel? Yes. But to whom?

Why did she keep following that destructive plan when she knew that if she was with Teo, it would just make Randall feel uncomfortable, as he couldn't stand Teo. It wouldn't hurt him at all because he didn't love her. Teo would only be glad because, in his eyes, it is proof that Anna was ready to be with him, that she had feelings for him.

It was cruel to her. She persisted, intending to punish herself. That she could not be ideal, whom Randall would fall in love with. That she could not love Teo, but he was worthy of reciprocal feelings. That she was ready to run like a dog when Randall whistled, and with all this, still hoping that his heart could change when he knew that Anna was with Teo.

She began to cry aloud. Some unknown force continued to drown her in the circumstances she had designed when that same pain stabbed her in the heart for the first time. Why couldn't she stop everything, as Mark had told her on the phone, pack up and go back to Mining Great City? What was she doing here?

Her shoulders, shaking with sobs, clasped in familiar hands. It was Teo.

"It's worth the Guinness book of world records for the weirdest reaction to a guy moving on to sex," he murmured, smiling in the darkness.

"Leave me alone, Teo," she barely squeezed the words.

"Never." He took her in his arms and carried her back into the room.

Putting her on the bed, he began to wipe her tears with light movements of his lips.

"I love you, silly. I was thinking now. I am sorry. Before you, I only had girls I picked up at concerts and parties and only for 'sleeping and forgetting in the morning.' I just desire you. I did not mean it to be offensive. I am sorry."

He grinned and went on softly, "But you are my love. Your body is a work of art to me. I adore you, every cell of your body, your laughter, your gestures. You are my ideal. I found you, and I don't want to lose you. Never."

With that, he began to cover her body with kisses and take off her clothes.

A private fear had haunted Anna. She had no other reason to prevent what was about to happen. She was not ready at all. But she did not want to hurt Teo.

She whispered inaudibly, "Sorry," and Teo proceeded.

Only the apology wasn't meant for him.