Wally: Who do you think would win in a fight to the death? IHOP or Denny's?
Dick: Denny's hands down.
IHOP hosts children's birthday parties but Denny's is the place where I'd go meet with some rogues or something.
Wally: I'm down with that logic
***
Dick: Did you know chickens are buoyant?!?!?!?
Wally: Why do you even know that?
Dick: A series of events may have occurred causing a chicken to get thrown into a pool
Wally: You better be calling with some details.
***
Dick: My therapist claims I'm preoccupied with vengeance
We'll see about that.
***
Wally: You often use humor to deflect serious trauma
Dick: Thank you
Wally: No no. That's not a good thing
Dick: What I'm hearing is that you think I'm funny
***
Dick: You are my favorite idiot
Wally: *sniffles* thanks I needed that
***
Wally: Shout out to water keeping my throat sufficiently lubricated for optimal yodeling techniques
Dick: That got weirder and weirder as I read it.
***
Wally: The fact that we know chameleons exist means that they're worthless idiot failures
Dick: You okay there buddy?
***
Wally: Is spelt spelled spelt of spelled?
Asking for a friend
Dick: *Sucks in breath* Okay take a seat I'm about to make your brain explode everywhere
Spelt is spelled spelt in any nation except America but in America spelt isn't spelled spelt it's spelled spelled.
Wally: And now there's brain guts everywhere.
***
Dick: I KNOW HOW TO SOLVE THE RISE OF OCEAN LEVELS
LINE THE COAST WITH PAPER TOWELS
THEY'RE SUPER ABSORBANT
Wally: WHY ARE YOU YELLING?!?!?!
Dick: BECAUSE I'M EXCITED
***
Wally: But what if it happens?!?!
Dick: It won't
Wally: But what if it does?!?!
YOU ARE READING
Off Time
FanfictionDick: How many chefs do you think were wrongfully executed in the medieval times because the King's food taster had a food allergy?; Wally: These are the type of questions I live for
