“Yo ho, you ho, a pirate’s life for me! We pillage and plunder , we rifle and loot. Drink up, me ‘earties, yo ho! A pirate’s life for me!”
Tom the barkeep at the Leaky Cauldron stared out at the group of odd men claiming to be pirates as they sang and sloshed rum and flirted with the other customers. Including Griselda, a raggedy hag who had, to Tom’s knowledge, but a single tooth. The noise and mess they were making was enough to make Tom down a few glasses of whiskey himself.
“It’s just for a few nights,” Albus Dumbledore had assured him, slipping him the bulging bag of gold.
Tom wished he had asked for more. He poured himself another glass of whiskey, but before he could bring it to his lips, a monkey leapt up onto the counter and jerked it out of his hands. A bloody monkey! He was getting a headache. The monkey took a sip of his drink, made a face, and promptly threw the glass, narrowly missing Tom’s head. Tom sighed.
It was going to be a long night.***
“Come in.”
Harry entered Dumbledore’s office, running a hand through his messy hair. Dumbledore beamed.
“Ah, Harry! My dear boy! Lemon drop?”
Harry shook his head.
Dumbledore shrugged, popping one of the candies in his own mouth.
“What brings you here tonight, Harry?”
Harry fiddled with the edge of his robe. “Er, sir, we read in the Daily Prophet a few days ago about, um, people washing up on the shore of Azkaban. Ron wrote a letter to his dad, who said that they believe themselves to be pirates, and that you think they could help the Order.”
Dumbledore beamed. “They ARE pirates, Harry. Here from a world beyond our very imaginings, and yet perhaps not as different at all.”
Harry frowned, puzzled. “Alright, then, Professor. But how can pirates help the Order?”
Dumbledore leaned forward. “Harry, do you believe in fate?”
Harry stared, bemused. “Like in everything happens for a reason?”
Dumbledore nodded.
“Not really, sir. Sirius didn’t have to die, and Voldemort didn’t have to become evil.”
Dumbledore smiled ruefully. “Well, then, my boy, let’s call it a hunch. I have a feeling that these men will be of great use to us in the upcoming battle, especially once we find all of the Horcruxes.”
Harry didn’t look convinced.
“And, if not, I must admit, they are marvelously entertaining if nothing else. And we have workers in the Department of Mysteries willing to help get them back to where they come from, but, as you are well aware, the department is currently in shambles.”
Harry nodded, still bemused.
“I’ve been meaning to ask you a favor, Harry. The pirates have nowhere else to go, and I was hoping you wouldn’t be adverse to…”
“Grimmauld Place,” Harry guessed.
Dumbledore beamed. “Yes, my boy, exactly.”
Harry shrugged. “I suppose that’s alright, sir.”
Dumbledore beamed again.
It was going to be a very interesting Christmas holiday, Harry thought as he made his way back to the Gryffindor common room.
YOU ARE READING
Maelstrom of Destiny
FantasyA parody of what might happen if the cast of Pirates of the Caribbean were to sail into Harry Potter's magical Britain. Short and humorous.
