The Untaken Vow

She is so Fine

My head hurts. I want to keep my eyes shut and not open it at all. But I can hear a soft voice calling out to me. "Good morning Beta, how do you feel?" I recognize it as a female voice quite close to my body, and my senses immediately make my eyes open.

She has a warm smile about her face but I cannot remember her. Have I met her before? I ask myself and not strangely the answer is a No! Well, everything is quite clear to me now. The reason I survived the night before was that she decided to help me.

"Good morning Ma'am, I hope I have not been too much of a trouble. I cannot thank you enough for what you have done for me", I answer in response as I struggle to lift my aching head from the pillow. Thankfully I manage a grateful smile. "If you tell me where the changing room is, I will freshen up and leave immediately."

I notice her properly then. She is a mature woman, in her late 40s probably. But age seems just a number; she looks so clean and fine. Looking at her, I try to think of my mother but my brain decides to stay silent yet again!

"What is the rush Beta, it is only 7:30. Sleep some more", she smiles her warm smile. Hearing her response, I wonder if I have said too much. "This is Soni", she calls a young girl closer to the bed. The girl seems obedient, may be in her 20s. "She is our cook's capable daughter and helps around in the house whenever she can. She will help you with everything you need. With this, they leave.

Here I am, alone in this huge room without a clue of my being. What am I going to answer if the kind lady asks me anything! I handily said that I would leave but where would I go without a single rupee in my pocket. With those thoughts and sleep evading me, I call out to Soni.

"Soni, I hope I did not disturb your work". "Not at all, I was just waiting for the bell. I was hoping you would call me quick because I have to attend my college", she replies putting down some clothes on the bed. College! Did I hear that right! I am glad that she is studying.

"Oh.. That is nice to hear. Where do you study?" I ask her, finally getting up from the bed. Thankfully, nothing apart from my head is hurting! "I am studying home science in the ABC College. It is just on the next road. I want to become a nutritionist," she replies proudly. "That is the least I can do to repay Madam's favors towards my family", she continues, the pride slowly turning into warmth in her eyes.

Well, now I also have something to repay Madam for her gesture. "Soni, I am completely new here. Who all stay in the house? Judging by the size of this room, I assume it is quite a house." There is a slight smile on her face; I guess she has judged my anxiety. "Yes, this is quite a house. But, for now, all you need to know is that Madam will take care of you. We do not gossip with guests." She hands me the clothes.

I head to the bathroom, refresh myself and put on the clean clothes. They are slightly loose, but they are so soft and clean. I am scared to see myself. Will I recognize my own being? From the last night, my memory just keeps failing me.

As expected, my own reflection in the mirror shocks me for a second. But thankfully, I can remember myself. It is the same big eyes and the same long hair which I recall myself with. It feels a strange feeling to be smiling, but I don't mind that! One step in the right direction! There are so many thoughts going on in my head and this is a positive sign. I know that I cannot remember a certain part of my life but the memory is definitely coming back once I see it. That is a big relief. My name, my family, my friends will all come back to me; I just need to believe!