I live in a room with a lock on the door,
The only way out is to have courage,
Courage doesn't exist to me anymore,
I forgot the meaning of faith,
They say god doesn't put more on you then you can bare,
But I think I reached my limited I can't bare the constant calls from the devil ,
Trying to push me off of the ledge,
I want to be free from this room,
Closed in by dull peach walls,
I think I'd feel somewhat better if the walls were black,
Confine me to a dark place,
Let me get in touch with my dark feelings,
Saying nothing comes easier than actually spilling out every single detail of my thoughts
I'm damaged goods that been tormented too many times , cause I'm playing the same game expecting different results.
I wish I could die already , there's no point of me living anymore.
After being mistreated and taken for granted so many times it hurts,
GET ME OUT THIS ROOM.
My body feels like theres a knife in every part of me ,
I'm just waiting for someone to put one through my heart maybe even my head to stop these thoughts
I'm like a ticking time bomb waiting to explode,
But I don't explode because when you choose the action, you have to accept the consequences,
& If you can't stand the heat, the you shouldn't have lit the fire,
They call me crazy and I believe it, Crazy like thinking of ways I would physically cause someone pain but too coward to actually do it, So stop calling me crazy, I'm not crazy, More like hopeless girl lost in the midst of it all, I think about how it will feel to trade places with my sister, Being confined to strict schedule and a square with bars as a room, I'm slowly forgetting how to feel, Not knowing what to feel, Forgot how it feels to smile, My face stays moist from my cries, I want to stop these tears but I can't, Why did god have to make me so strong , cause at times I wish I was the weakest link who don't know how to deal with hard trials, I used to laugh,until there was tears coming out my eyes, My laughs are more like slight chuckles, My body movements become inactive, My feelings become easier to hurt making myself vulnerable, Now, I'm an evil bitch who's slowly forgetting how to care, I don’t have an attitude problem, You have a problem with my attitude, and that’s not my problem, If my attitude to could kill I'll be a weapon of mass destruction, GET ME OUT THIS ROOM, I've been having these mental battleships with my mind and my heart, I want my heart to vanish, I followed that more than I took consideration to my thoughts, I keep knocking on the walls, Scratching at my skin, I'm not comfortable with myself in this condition, I let people take advantage of me too many times until I realize what I really deserve, I put my trust into the wrong people once again just get that shit thrown in my face, A broken trust can be described as melted chocolate no matter how hard you try to freeze it will never return to its true shape, I'm a monster, No one should love me, Too afraid to admit that I think there's something wrong with me, My concussion sound too far away from head I couldn't hear my thoughts clearly, I wish my mom would have aborted me, Why on earth would they allow her to have a creature like me, They'd tell you to be yourself then when you're showing your real color they call you a bitch, My whole life has been nothing but pain so if I tell you I love you I really do, I just have a hard way of showing it.
