another life ~fransykes~

12

Oliver's POV

I woke up to a familiar, sweet smell in the air. Slowly, I turned over under the bed sheets and cams face to face with the biggest bouquet of flowers I had ever seen. The flowers were a range of different colours and sizes; everything from strong scented lavender to beautiful pink roses.

I slipped my fingers over the cold, smooth surface of the flower petals, feeling each one under my warm fingertips. I smiled, for what felt like the first time in forever.

Since Josh and I went to the cinema, Josh had been a lot more distant. After we got home, Josh practically pushed me back into the basement and didn't come back for another couple of days. When he did come back, he was different. More anxious maybe? Cautious almost?

I'm not sure but something was defiantly slightly off. Was it because I spoke? Or because I ran off? Maybe he thinks that whilst I was missing I told someone and that they were coming to find me. That was definitely not true, no one was ever coming to find me. No one cared about me when I was around so I highly doubted they cared now, in fact I bet some people were glad I was gone.

After all, I was just that quite kid in class that everyone seemed to talk about because it was so easy to chat shit about me when i couldn't say anything back. I knew lots of peoples secrets too, mostly because people weren't scared to talk around me. They knew I would never tell, that I couldn't, so they found no point in talking quietly around me.

For instance, when Elenor Smith from my maths class got pregnant in year 10 I was the first people who found out because she told Leila Thompson about it right in front of me. She wasn't bothered about me knowing although no one else was allowed to know. In that moment it was like I was completely invisible to her, invisible to everyone.

I had so many peoples secrets, and yet now they are all useless information to me. I will never see Elenor Smith again and she will never see me, if she even ever did. I was irrelevant to her and now it's her turn to be irrelevant to me. I doubt my name will ever enter her mind again, and yet I still know her biggest darkest secret that even most of her friends don't even know.

She will never think about me again, none of them will. And that's a good thing right? I no longer need to worry about what other people think of me because they will never see me again. I will be forgotten. A ghost. I wonder if people will pretend to care. Does Maise Anderson from my physics class remember that time in year 7 when I leant her a pen? Or does Zach Johnson remember that time he accidentally tripped me up in the corridor and gave me a nose bleed? I wonder if they went home that night after they realised I was missing and celebrated, or pretended to care to their peers for their own benefit.

The only person who won't forget me is Josh. And lately I've begun to feel like he was forgetting me too, which honestly broke my heart. He's been so nice to me and made me feel like I....belong for the first time in ages. But now he hardly comes to see me.

Until today I guess, as he's clearly been down here to give me flowers. Over the past couple of weeks the only time he's come down is to check on me or to stock up my food supplies or to change my bedding. He asks me if I'm okay but his questions are empty, like he feels obliged to ask me but doesn't really care about the answer.

Maybe these flowers are a sign that he wants to go back to normal, that he's finally forgiven me. I hope so.

I flip over the small piece of paper that was slotted between two large roses. The paper itself is florally smelling and made of light yellow card.
On the back it says 3 simple words in messy, almost illegible handwriting that make my heart flutter.

I love you.

Those three little words make my face go beet red and my eyes widen. He loves me? He has a real funny way of showing it. He's been basically avoiding me for almost 3 weeks now, which isn't something that exactly screams "I love you".

I put the flowers back into my night stand as I hear footsteps echoing through the empty living room. I sit still, frozen, as the door opens before me and Josh walks in, almost timidly. I've never really seen Josh look shy before, he was always so confident and put together. The timid look defiantly didn't suite him.

"Do you like your flowers? I had them picked and arranged just for you." He says, scratching the back of him head awkwardly. The comfortable silence that normally lingers between us is replaced with a overpoweringly awkward one.

He steps towards me and I stay still, looking up at him with my confused brown eyes.

"I'm sorry I've been kind of ignoring you lately. I felt so bad about shouting at you and it's been killing me inside knowing that I made you feel like they did."

He doesn't need to elaborate for me to know who he meant by them. He meant the people from school who made me feel like shit, my parents who never cared, my neighbors who didn't help me when no one else would, the teachers who never questioned where my bruises came from.
Everyone except him.

"I'm so so sorry Liv. Please forgive me? Fuck, being away from you for so long has made me realise that I can't live without you. I need you, Oliver. I love you so much." He rambled.

I was left speechless, I don't know what to say but I knew I wanted to forgive him too. I wanted to go back to how things were before between us, without all this awkwardness and avoiding each other. It was all so pointless.

"I forgive you." I said quietly but in the silent room it felt louder than a shout. I almost flinched at the sound of my own voice. His eyes lit up like stars at the sound of my voice.

"You mean that?" He asked. I rolled my eyes and nodded.

He rushed over to me and hugged me from the side. I turned in the slightly awkwardly positioned embrace and wrapped my arms around his neck whilst his stayed on my back.

He leant his forehead onto mine as I closed my eyes. He was so close that I could feel his warm breath on my face. I could feel the heat of his body next to mine. I could feel more than I had ever felt before.

"I need you so much, Oliver." He whispered into my hair as he kissed my forehead gently. It was a cute gesture.

"Not as much as I need you." I whispered back. And it was true, I needed him so much. I don't have anything left except for him. He was my everything, whether I like it or not.

He was the only one who saw me, who bothered to keep me safe where as everyone else didn't bother. He made me feel like a human being again, not just that boy in the back of the class who didn't exists.

If only I knew then what else Josh would make me feel.