Chemical Kids And Mechanical Brides

~Chapter Seventeen~

Jaime P.O.V
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Why am I so fucking stupid. I love her and I call her a bitch. All she wanted to do is see Austin's band. why was that so bad? why am I being rude. I try to avoid mike and Vic's gaze.

" Get out " mike says calmly. I just sit with my head in my hands. I'm so stupid. So fucking stupid.

" Get the fuck out both of you!" Vic's hisses and then runs up stairs. I don't move I can't move. I feel stuck here. like Im glued to the seat. I was stuck.

" Get the fuck out of our fucking house. you called our little sister a bitch. Not to mention the girl you are absolutely in love with a "bitch". You tony perry that's your best fucking friend. Get the fuck out of my house the both of you!" Mike yells. Tony hangs his in shame. We both walk out the house heads down and the door slams shut behind us. I can't believed I said that to her. I let a sob escape my lips as I sit on the porch steps.

" Do they think they are fucking cute? Calling our baby sis a bitch and getting mad about iris not wanting to stay here. Are you fucking kidding me." Vic says. well it came out more like a hiss.

" I should go beat his ass right now. Vic you can fucking stop me vic." I hear mike. Shit... the door swings open. The next thing I know I shoved up against wall. I whine in pain.

" I thought you loved my sister. Turns out your just like kellin. A no good son of a bitch. You broke her... do you know how many times I heard her crying. play fucking piano at late hours of the fucking night. I was afraid she was going to do something stupid. I didn't want to see my little sister in a hospital or even worse in the fucking ground. I'm one if her older brothers I don't ever want to fucking think that Jaime Preciado. you were suppose to be different...Not like kellin. In my fucking opinion I think your worst then him." mike says in discussed. That felt like a knife. I was officially worst then kellin. He shoves me against the wall.

" Do you how that makes me feel as a brother?! it makes me feel like fucking shit. Hear her cry. see her broken. Seeing her not her happy dorky self. I had so see a different side of her. She busted her knuckles because of you. she stayed at Quinn's house. It's taking me so much not to put you in a hospital." he hisses. He punched me in my nose and let me drop.

" Get the fuck off my pouch... before I really beat your ass." He hiss. I nod and take off holding my nose. Tony rushes to my side. He makes me sit down on the side walk. He looks at me with sad eyes.

" I'm sorry Jaime...." he says more quiet then normal. He feels like shit too. I stay silent. what can I really say. Tony sighs and pulls me into a side hug ish. I cry silent tears. Tony pulls me up and we start walking. We walk for what seems like hours but we walk somewhere where the door closes. I hold my head in my hands. I tug at my hair. I'm so stupid. I'm so stupid. the bed sinks a bit and some one places there hand on my shoulder.

" I'm sorry Jaime..." Tony says quietly. I shrug his hand off. I just want to be by myself.

" Tony I love you and all but can I be by myself please." I whisper. He nods and squeezes my shoulder before leaving my room. I bury my face in my pillows. I just let every out. my body was shaking uncontrollably. I'm such a fuck up. I miss everything about her. her, lips, tiny hands, beautiful eyes, her everything... I need to feel pain. I'm craving it. craving it. * triggering * I search for something anything to I inflicted pain on my self. I find a pencil sharpener and take it apart. I twirl the blade I between my fingers. do I want to do this? of course I do... I fucked up with the love of my life. I bring the blade to my wrist. I bite my lip hard and whine. One for being stupid. Two for being worthless. Three for hurting iris twice. four more for ruing everything. I look at my arm and cringe. I get up and walk to my bathroom. I rinse my arm and dry it off. I finish up in the bathroom and walk to my closet. I find a sweatshirt and tug it on over my head. I sit on my bed and let tears slip down my face. I lift my left sleeve and run my fingers over my fresh cuts. I let my tears slip down my cheeks on to my arms. I pull my sleeve down and crawl into my covers. My hand hits a lump in my sheets. I reach for it and pull it out. It was iris favorite shirt. Her upon a burning body shirt to be more specific. I held it close to my chest. it still smells like her. This is her absolute favorite shirt. Mike had taken her to see them. I never seen her so happy.i squeeze it in my hands. I close my eyes tightly. I slowly drift asleep.
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Next morning
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I roll awake. I have a pain In my wrist and my eyes hurt. I sigh as I remember the events of last night. I still had iris shirt cliched tightly in my hands.How could I do this to her. She's going to find someone better then me. I'm going to die alone. It was still early because it was still dark out. So I cried silently into her shirt. iris you don't know how sorry I am I every hurt you. I never want to Let go of her shirt. I must of fell asleep because I could see light shinning though the blinds. I sigh and push the sheets off myself. I walk to my closet. I grab some clean boxers, sweat shirt and some sweats. Walking to the bathroom I strip and look at my reduction. I'm discussing. no wonder why iris didn't want me. I'm ugly. I sigh and turn on the shower. I wait for it to warm up before hoping in.
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Iris P.O.V
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I wake up with my phone ringing. with out thinking I grab it and slide the green button.

" Hello?" I say sleepily.

" Iris look I know I'm the last person you want to talk to right now and you can hate me all you want because I know I was a prick to you yesterday... but listen to me please..." Tony whines.

" Tony? What's wrong?" I ask some what more awake now. I run my hand in Alan's long hair.

" Jaime... I don't what happened after I left... Im worried. iris I don't what he's going to do to him self. " tony whispers. my mouth hangs open.

" Tony... you-you... you don't mean..." I jumble out. I hear him sigh. we only call each other when it's serous other wise we would text each other.

" See I don't know iris...he just wanted to be by him self. Iris I'm afraid of what he'll do to him self... I don't know what he will do iris." he says. I feel a lump form in my throat.

" Y-y-yeah... i-I'm going to go. B-bye tone." I mumble.

" Bye iris... I'll let you know if I hear any thing" he says and hangs up. fuck me. He better not be doing what Vic used to do. Austin and Alan were still asleep on my lap so I couldn't get up. Fuck me in my fucking ass. Fuck me... fuck me! I must have done something because Austin woke up. Shit.

" Are you okay iris?" austin asks sleepily. oh god morning voices are my weakness. Ughhhh. i stop running my hand in Alan's hair. I shake my head and my hair falls out of its bun covering my face.

" Iris... look at me." Austin says softly. Austin puts his fingers under my chin And makes me look up at him.

" Iris please... I'm your best friend..." he whispers looking me in the eyes. He looks at me with pleasing eyes.

" I-I... it's...jaime." I finally whisper. I was trying to keep everything in but failed. Tears start to fall down my tan cheeks. Austin moves Alan off my lap genially and pulls me onto his lap. I wrap my arms around his neck and burry my head in his chest. Austin puts his arms around my waist holding me tightly. He rests his head on my shoulder. He gently rubs my back in circles.

" Do you want to talk about it?" He asks softly. I'm sure he heard everything.why not. Better then keeping it in. Austin rubs my back and burry his face in my neck.

" I-I...It-it's... jaime... tony-tony he... called me this morning... he's worried for Jaime. Shit... I-I am too. " I whisper. He gasps a bit.

" You-you don't mean... Like-like." he stumbles out. I nod slowly. I tighten my grip on Austin neck. He tightens his grip on my waist. holding me closer to his chest.

" Iris...baby girl... why don't you stay here we can watch star wars and eat junk food. I hate seeing you upset. " Austin's whispers in my ear. I nod my head. He move me over and sets up the movie. See I'm super close to austin. He puts the movie in and sits so I can cuddle into his chest. Austin pulls a blanket over us and we sit in silents. sometimes quiet is violent. I stays at Austin's for a few more hours. Watching Star Wars with Alan and aus. it kept my mind off jaime.

" Hey Aus can I borrow a shirt? I forget to bring one. " I giggle. He nods and walks to his room. he walks back out with one and hands it to me. I change in the bath room. Man his misfits shirt is fucking huge on me. I try to make it fit me a bit better. which sorta worked I guess better them it was. I walk back out with my bag on my shoulder. Alan hugs me me close to his cheat.

" I love you my precious little nugget... Just remember that. Don't let him get to you... Okay?... I gotta go now nugget." he whispers and kissed my cheek. I giggle and smile at him. he walks out the door.

" Hey aus?... I'm gonna go... I want to talk to my brothers and stuff. I'll texted you later." I say aloud. I feel arms wrap around me .

" Yeah okay iris. I'll see you later." he says. I smile and give him a proper hug and start to head home.