MULATTO (Iyila) (Editing)

chapter twenty one ~ Dedicated to Me

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Sometimes, Iyila wondered what it would be like to be with Dede, lips locked and legs entwined, but she would never know. Dede was avoiding her and had stopped persuading her to accept him after Iyila bluntly waved him off. She had acted rudely for the purpose of easily driving him away without him having a second thought of returning. But at times she wondered what it could be like to have Dede wrapped in her arms and kissing her just as he had done at the stream. She could not understand the irony of the whole drama. She had always wanted Dede, but when he finally came to her all she could do was to hurl him away like a piece of garbage. She could not forget the pain and regret in his eyes and how piercing they were - as if he wanted to sink into her soul and convince her, but she had immediately bolted the door to her heart, not allowing any of his sweet words to penerate even through the smallest hole. She refused to take her chances, it was too risky and if she did not play fair she knew she could get burnt.

When she saw him, she usually looked away or increased her steps even when she knew he was not at her back. Guilt and regret was already consuming a large part of her and she could not tell anyone, not even Deila. However the night she was returning from Brown's house, and she saw Dede standing with another female Negro, beside a tree and tied to his body as if she would want to sink into him, she almost died of shock.

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Collete's heart was racing more than a train in motion. Her heart was pounding so loud that she did not hear Susan's voice calling on her to stop. The walk to the study seemed farther than usual even with her almost running. When she saw the door, Collete did not bother to knock before entering and rudely slammed the door; just as she planned it caught his attention. She saw her father seated with a bewildered expression on his face as if he had seen a ghost.

"What have you done father?" she calmly asked, trying to suppress, without success, the anger that she felt inside. She wished she could fry the old man that she called father.

"What is the meaning of this Collete have you lost your senses? How dare you walk in here without my permission, where are your manners?" John firmly asked.

"Unfortunately father, I lost it the moment I learned you were planning on shipping me to Longworth's plantation like a lowly slave," she replied.

"Marraige," he corrected and Susan rushed in the next minute gasping for air. "Collete come with me," she said walking to Collete without sparing John a glance. She had considered his plan ridiculous but he had made it clear that his decision was irrevocable.

"I will not mother!" she screamed.

"Collete dear, please come with me, leave your father alone."

"I will not marry Longworth, Father."

He frowned and firmly said, "That is not open for argument," and continued his writing . "I will not let you choose my husband."

"You do not have a choice, Mr Longworth is a wealthy and ri__"

"I do not care about his money Father," Collete cried.

"And what do you care about? Love?" he questioned.

"Yes!"

He laughed, "Love? Oh you are indeed a child. What do you know about love? Do not be stupid girl. Love is only in your head."

"I refuse to believe so."

"Ask your mother Collete and get out of my study, I am busy," he announced, and turned to his book. Susan turned to him but did not utter a word. She grabbed Collete by the elbow but Collete rudely brushed her away.