The Way We Get By

21 // Angel

I think it's safe to say that I fucked up. Royally.

Beating the living shit out of Sean felt cathartic, at least while I was doing it. The aftermath hasn't been so nice. Sean's not pressing charges, which is a miracle considering I may or may not have broken his nose and busted his upper lip.

But as for my social life, well—it's pretty much gone to shit. The guys on my basketball team, basically all of my friends, are taking Sean's side and giving me the cold shoulder. It's understandable, I guess, considering I beat the shit out of him over a girl. I just couldn't help myself, though. It's not just a girl—it's Eliza.

She's got those devilish little eyes that catch me off guard every time I look at her, and that smile that brings out her dimples and these pink lips that are so soft and warm. She always smells like clean laundry and something sweet, a smell that's pretty much become a drug to me at this point.

And just to think that she was with Sean the whole time and that he knew how I felt about her—that makes my blood boil and my fists itch in urgency. But I've learned my lesson now, and my parents have made it clear that violence won't solve a damn thing.

So, while violence may not do anything, standing on Eliza's doorstep and begging her to forgive me just might. I walked all the way from my house, and I can feel the cold beginning to find its way into every crevice of my body despite the winter jacket that I'm wearing.

I take my stiff hand out of my pocket and reach up to rap on her wooden door, a sound that echoes through her house and the air around me. Her dad is home, which is evident from his black SUV sitting in the driveway, and I'm just praying he isn't the one to answer the door.

Thankfully, after a moment of suspense, the door opens to reveal a very unimpressed Eliza. She's clad in a pink sweater and tight, form-fitting ripped jeans, her shiny black hair hugging her hips as it always does.

"You look nice—"

"What do you want?"

Her harsh, unforgiving tone takes me back and I struggle to find a way to respond to her hostile nature.

"I—I wanted to see you."

"And I want to see you leave," she bites back while leaning against her door frame with an angry eyebrow raised.

"You're mad at me—"

"Pissed is more accurate."

I drop my arms down in defeat and accept the fact that I may not be able to get rid of the attitude she's holding up, and that this may not go down as well as I imagined it to.

"Can I just say my peace?" I ask with desperate, begging eyes. "And then if you don't want to talk... I—I'll leave."

Eliza sighs and lets her arms fall from her chest. She goes quiet for a moment before gesturing for me to start.

"Fine. You've got one minute."

"Okay, I just want to say that I'm sorry for beating up Sean because I know you guys clearly had something going on but I only did it because I really care about you and I didn't want to see you with anyone else and I thought we had something going but then I just got so mad when I found out you were with Sean and I felt betrayed and I'm just sorry—"

"Angel."

Her soft, quiet voice breaks me out of my incessant rambling and brings me back to her comforting presence. But something about the way she says my name tells me that her words may be ones that I don't want to hear.

She glances behind her into her house, presumably checking for her father, and when she sees that the coast is clear, she steps onto the porch with me and closes the door behind her.