~BTS Oneshots~

Out of Love. (J.J.K)

A/N- Feel free to listen 

I won't tell you I'm lonely.

          You and Jungkook were inseparable, always by each other's side. When you harbored feelings, you were scared. What would he think? You didn't want to ruin the relationship you already had.

'Cause that might be selfish.

          When he told you that he loved you, you were ecstatic. Never in your life would you think that Jeon Jungkook would like a girl like you. It lasted for three wonderful years, each day filled with love, comfort and security. You thought that you'd stay like that forever, with your supposed soulmate at your side. You should've known better than to assume that everything would last that long.

I won't ask you to hold me.

          As the days grew colder and longer, you noticed that he went home later, much later than what his job required. At first, you brushed it off. He's a hard worker, you'd muse, then busy yourself with another activity. However, you can't escape the inevitable, you can only acknowledge it, and accept what will happen.

'Cause that won't mend what's helpless.

          You would be lying if you said you didn't miss him. His hugs were no longer warm, and his I love yous were emotionless. It hurt to see him like this, eyes void of the warmth that used to glimmer whenever you were around. His actions were cold and distant, and his mind seemed to be afloat in a dimension you can never see.

There's not a thing I could say.

          Once, you tried to ask him what was going on. Why was he acting like this? Jungkook responded, but it wasn't a soft apology, nor was it anything you expected from the usual sweet-hearted boy. I don't feel it anymore, Y/n. Only time will tell what will happen. 

Not a song I could sing. 

          That night, your heart shattered in a million pieces. The man that was your first everything, telling you that he felt nothing, was like salt to an open wound. You cried later, away from his eyes of course. Taking your pillows and clothes, you trudged to another room, one that was far from your old shared bedroom. As soon as your head hit the soft material, the first tears pricked  your eyes. 

For your mind to change.

          Days forward, you both avoided each other like a plague, leaving the room as soon as one appears. Your friends found it awkward, as you two used to be inseparable. You hated what you've become. It was like the piece that controls your happiness was getting lost, and that piece, as much as you despised it, was none other than Jungkook.

Nothing can fill up the space.

           In the times where you sat alone with your thoughts, your mind would often wander to when you and Jungkook were happy. Before, you being lonely was a joke, one that you'd laugh at together. Now? It felt like he was the one laughing at your pain, taking amusement in the times when you'd shied your eyes away from him holding another girl's hand, or when he'd place a gentle kiss upon her cheek. 

Won't ask you to stay

          He came to you weeks after, luggage in hand with an empty look in his onyx eyes. Oh, how long have you waited for this day, the day when he'd finally end your misery by declaring his departure. Jungkook was about to close the door before you grabbed his hand and turned him to face you. His eyebrows went up in amusement, assuming that you'd ask him to stay, but what you said next surprised him.

But let me ask you one thing.

          "When did you fall out of love?" You asked, voice steady, eyes clear and posture straight. You looked right into his eyes, amazed at yourself for your own bravery. "What happened? Was it me? Was I not good enough?" The last of your questions fell into the cold silence, him whirling around and slamming the door. In another lifetime, you would've begged him to stay, let him ruin you. But you wouldn't let this man ruin your life. You were going to build it back up, you were going to show him that you were happy. It may not happen now, but it will, and you'll make sure of it. 

When did you fall out of love... with me?