The Fire Within

Mother's Love

Alex smiled, his closed eyelids illuminated by the late afternoon sun. The smile stretched from his lips to his crinkled eyes and his excited fidgeting as his father spoke.

"She'll be here soon," he said as Alex opened his eyes and took in his father without his usual mask. He stood in a large archway twisted with ribbon and white roses. Alex chuckled, smiling at him.

"I can't wait," he said eagerly, his hands folded behind him as a soft, sweet medley filled the area around him. Alex glanced down the aisle, lined with faces he knew and faces he didn't. He took a deep breath, bracing himself for what he saw next.

Cirice. Her dark hair was entwined with white flowers, intricate curls, and braids stretching down her back. The flowers twisted into a crown making her look more like a queen. Her simple white dress was etched with lace flowers that echoed the ones in her hand. She was beaming, her arm entwined with a man Alex didn't recognize yet wasn't alarmed by. The walked slowly up the aisle, Alex drinking in the moment and fighting back the tears that formed at the corners of his eyes.

She was beautiful, ethereal and very soon, all his. 

Suddenly, the bright sun that was illuminating her so beautifully was swallowed by clouds. Alex glanced back and then righted himself, this time finding Cirice alone as she walked towards him. A red blot formed on her dress above her heart. Alex's brows furrowed in confusion as the blot grew bigger swallowing the dress in crimson as Cirice cried out, falling.

"Cirice!" Alex screamed, attempting to dart to her side but finding his feet cemented into the Earth. He looked up, taking in Cirice as she writhed in pain. Suddenly the guests were all standing, clamoring forward and into Cirice, swallowing her whole.

Alex shot straight up, a cry escaping his lips. For a moment he had no idea where he was, soon reality crept back as he fell back, his head colliding with the headboard. He slumped down, pain radiating through his skull as the colors of dawn painted the sky outside his window. It was a dream and nightmare all wrapped in one. Alex watched his dark ceiling, fighting to remember the good parts. He could barely grasp the image of Cirice and it frustrated him.

A soft knock sounded at his door and Alex looked over. "Alex, darling are you alright?" his mother's voice was muffled by the thick wood. Was he alright? Alex didn't really know. The door opened and his mother appeared, still in her nightdress and holding an oil lamp.

"A nightmare?" she asked softly, pushing the door shut and walking over. Alex nodded wordlessly, watching as she righted the chair he had assaulted the night prior and sat down.

"I barely recognize you, you know. It seems like only yesterday your feet could barely touch the footboard," she said, letting out a small laugh at Alex's feet that dangled at least half a foot off the end of the bed. He had taken to sleeping in a fetal position to maintain comfort and warmth. Alex dropped his eyes and sighed, sitting up.

"You love her, don't you?" she whispered as Alex looked up at her. Her long hair was encased in a disheveled braid, her worn features taking him in. Alex scoffed, glancing out the window and into the icy morning.

"It doesn't matter now," he replied his voice as bitter as the morning that bloomed beyond the glass of his window. His face fell as he shook his head. 

"Poppycock. Of course it does." she insisted, taking his hand. Alex jumped at the action. For years he had been depraved of maternal affection, only memories comforting him. Now she was here and Alex felt guilt pit in his stomach as he recalled his behavior since he arrived home.

"What do I do?" he pleaded, his voice breaking. His mothers face softened as she squeezed his hand.

"I cannot tell you what to do. This is your life, and contrary to what your father has claimed, you have a choice," she said, glancing back at the door.

"W-What are you trying to tell me?" Alex asked, brows furrowed in confusion. His mother widened her eyes.

"Did you know your father wasn't supposed to marry me?" she asked in a matter-of-fact tone. Alex let out a huh and eyed her. She nodded, pressing her lips together as memories flooded back to her. 

"He was intended to another. A young woman who was banished for violating the laws of the Vale," she explained, picking at a stray thread in her wool gown. 

"You mean the Dark Vale?" Alex clarified as she narrowed her eyes.

"Yes, the Dark Vale. Don't remind your mother of how old she is!" she teased, gently smacking his arm. Alex laughed.

"Anyway, Father Nihil--Cirice's grandfather, intended to match him with someone else. A Sister of high rank and social standing. Instead, your father petitioned to have me, a Potential, be his wife. It caused quite the scandal and it probably helped that you were already on the way." she said, gently tapping his nose. 

"Ugh," Alex said, his face twisting in disgust as she laughed.

"Wait, does that mean you knew Cirice's mother?" he asked, watching her. She nodded, glancing out the window taking in the snowy treetops in the distance.

"What was she like?" Alex inquired, as she smiled.

"Otherworldly, beautiful, loyal and fiercely courageous," she said, listing off qualities that Evelyn possessed. Alex smiled to himself, letting out a soft chuckle.

"Like mother like daughter," he whispered, leaning on his arm as he thought of her. His mother watched him, noting his expressions when she knew who he was thinking of.

"You are your father's world you know," she said as Alex's face fell. He turned his mouth out sourly, refusing to meet her gaze. 

"As if." he snorted as she shook her head.

"When you were born he held you for hours, just staring at you. I had to battle him just to nurse," she said, letting out a light laugh. Alex didn't budge, his eyes hard as he eyed her. 

"When you left, he sat up for weeks thinking about you. He was angry as was I. We couldn't understand why you would leave us. How you could be so fearless when you were so small, but then we looked at each other and knew that it was because of her." Alex met his mother's eyes, tears streaming down her face. Alex sat up and pulled her into his arms, breathing in her familiar scent of lilies and spice.

"How many Cirices to you think come along in this world?" she whispered, his warmth comforting to her. Alex held her for a moment, afraid if he let go she would vanish. 

"I know you will do what is right today. Regardless of your decision, we will always be your parents and we love you more than you could ever know," she said into Alex's neck, savoring the moments she had with him. She released him and squeezed his chin.

"What do you say to your favorite breakfast? You only get married once," she said casually, a mischievous glint in her eye.