Losing My Way (A Brian May fanfiction)

Devil Inside

*This story is filled with mature content.
If you are offended by any of the following, please reconsider your decision to read, or continue on at your own discretion:

Foul language, sexual content, religious slander, body image issues.

At times, there may be a negative light cast on the Catholic religion, as it is a story about someone grappling with their faith- However, nothing in this story is a reflection of my own beliefs.

Thank you for reading, and I hope you enjoy!

-TheMrsMay

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He's incredible.

I traced my fingertip along the edge of his jaw, around his full lips and over his long hair.

His voice is playing out softly in the room. It's deep and velvety, and the sound of it alone is enough to make my knees weak. I wish he was here now- touching me, kissing me, fulfilling desires I know I shouldn't have-

But he's not.

Listening to his song and staring at his picture on an album cover will have to do.

"Nancy! Are you ready for church?" My mother's voice called out from just beyond my door.

I immediately pulled my hand out of my pajama bottoms.

"Yes mom!" I frantically dismantled my turntable, sleeved the record, and shoved all of the incriminating items under my bed.

I was lying. I wasn't ready for church at all.

I thought I could have a quiet moment alone with a fantasy of Jim Morrison- but apparently the time  has come to serve the Lord, who no doubt is looking down at me in disgust.

I put on a suitable dress, and met my parents down by the front door, still flushed from my little escapade upstairs. Then the three of us headed to the car, and my dad drove, while my mom let us in on some gossip about the neighbors' kid getting caught smoking pot.

Halfway through her story, I zoned out- filling my head with images of Robert Plant, and the way his tight pants never leave much room for imagination.

See, I have a problem.

And that problem is temptation.

I've grown up in a strict Catholic household. Everything in my life has been carefully monitored and regulated by my parents.

I've done all they've ever asked me to do- I've played in sports, I've sang in the youth choir, I've kept good grades, and I've only hung out with approved friends.

And up until just recently, I never listened to Rock and Roll music, hadn't touched a drop of alcohol, and I absolutely never thought about sex- an act that no young woman should consider until after saying her wedding vows.

For the longest time, I was a good girl. I was too focused on doing right to become enchanted by the darker side of life.

Until, of course, my best friend Diana came to sway me.

How Diana's managed to skate by in our all girls' Catholic high school has always amazed me. On the outside, she appears to be a model member of the church: with her doe-like eyes, modest clothing, and her involvement in many prestigious clubs. She's worked hard to fool all of the adults in our lives into believing her farce- but only I know the true Diana.

She bought me my first rock album, The Rolling Stones' "Beggars Banquet".

I remember feeling a strange euphoria when Diana played the first track to me up in her parents' attic. It was nothing like any of the music I've heard before. It made me want to move, and we did just that. The both of us danced wildly together up until the song ended. That's when she told me the name of it-