Losing My Way (A Brian May fanfiction)

Give a Little Bit

"I'm sorry sir, we couldn't hold your reservation." The hostess apologized. "We gave your table to another party."

Of course.

Brian closed his eyes, the frustration evident in his face. "But it was only fifteen minutes."

The hostess smiled. "I do apologize, sir. If you'd like, we could seat you at the bar until another table has opened up." She looked down at her seating chart, frowning hopelessly.

"And how long will that take?" Brian asked.

The hostess shrunk a bit. "About 40 minutes sir."

Brian exhaled, turning to me. The stress in his expression was enough to make me shift on my feet.

"We should go." I said, dejected. This date was a complete bust. This was a night I had dreamed about for so long, and it turned out to be one of the worst- through no fault of the both of us. It was the first night I had been allowed out. It was the first night I could've felt free without the lingering guilt of doing something wrong.

We walked out of the restaurant together, and when we were outside, he took me by the hand. "I'm so sorry." He winced, and I caught his eyes. I clenched up and turned away.

"Please don't give up on me." He begged, stepping in front of me. "I've tried so hard... I don't know how to fix this."

I pointed my eyes at my feet, wanting to tell him a million things. I was mostly just trying not to tear up again, and I knew I would cry if I looked at him for too long. I hate crying in front of people, and I had already done it once tonight.

"Please." He repeated, his tone desperate. "What can I do? Should we try a different place?"

"I'm not so hungry anymore." I murmured.

His shoulders slumped. "Fuck."

Fuck indeed.

I sighed, sitting down on the curb. He sunk down beside me, putting his head in his hands. I stared out at the cars in the parking lot, and spotted a couple who were leaving the restaurant together- hand in hand and all smiles. That could have been Brian and I.

"What did she say to you?" Brian asked after a moment.  "Monica." He added in for clarity. I all but cringed at the sound of her name.

"She told me a long, cautionary tale." I said. "She asked me not to tell you about it though."

"Very funny." He grumbled.

"Do you want to hear a funnier joke?" I eyed the happy couple. "My life."

"Now you're just being dramatic."

"You're right," I allowed, "but it feels good right now... Cathartic even." I turned, only to see a different couple walking to their cars. They said a few words to each other and kissed before they went their separate ways. Now it felt like God was just punishing me. I was half expecting a lightning bolt to strike me dead.

Brian sat up suddenly- the gears in his head turning.  He looked to me, very cautiously before saying- "I have an idea."

I cocked my head to the side in question.

"If you're willing to give it another go- our date- I'd like to take you somewhere else."

"Where?" I asked.

"You'll have to trust me. I want it to be a surprise."

"A surprise?" As if I needed another surprise tonight.

"Yes... Only if you haven't given up yet. I won't blame you if you ask me to drive you home instead, but I'm begging you to consider it." His tone was hopeful, pleading even.