The Writing Process

12. What Is Writing And Why Do I Do It?

Writing is often glorified as an easy way to become rich and famous.
Do you think JK Rowling said, 'Accio book' and Harry Potter landed in her hand?
Did it seem that Stephen King pulled Pennywise out of the drain because the written book was floating in his balloon?

Nope. If that's how easy you thought it would be, you'd have better luck selling cupcakes at the mall.

Writing takes alot of brain power. It takes hours and hours of thinking and invisioning scenes in your head before you sit down to write.
And then, on those blessed days when you actually open a document, the words don't always come.
A perfectly constructed scene in your head but gibberish on your page.
Mostly it's a form of mental self harm. It can drive a person totally insane.
But on those rare occasions when something turns out, when I can look at the paragraph and say,

"That's actually pretty okay."

Those are the occasions that keep me tapping away at this god forsaken keyboard.

Why do I do it?

I don't know!

I love it I guess.
I don't do it to make money or please anyone else. I write because it makes me happy. If my words make someone feel something along the way, then I've done my job.

I don't have any plans of publishing. Unlike almost everyone, I don't hold money on a pedestal.

Things like love, kindness, and good morals take that position. I dont want this to be about how many books I can sell. I don't want to package and brand my creativity. I'd rather share it freely with no strings attached.
Right now, I write solely for the fun of it.

Last notes? Just something to remember.

Fake it 'til you make it, is not a lie.
Maybe, by the time you read this, I'll have enough readers to be believable.
But as of 9/24/2019 1:04am, I'm no one special.

I've given myself the name Nightwriter247 because it fits my personality: a person who writes at night with a random number that doesn't stand out just like me.

I speak to my audience of maybe five and call them NightCrawlers.
I do it for me.
I do it for them.
Mostly I do it for the illusion.

But you believed me didn't you?
You assumed I knew what I was doing and done it a hundred times.
Why?
Because I didn't falter. Because I sounded confident. On the outside, I even look it.
But on the inside I'm screaming with panic and doubt like all writers are.

But as long as you sound good, as long as you fake it, you will be believed.
And then one day you'll realize, you were never fake at all.