STAY

Sixty Six

I had my eyes closed in an attempt to stay calm. I could feel hands pulling at my hair gently but firmly. "Genevieve, can you just let your head fall forward slightly?" said Freya, the hairdresser who was at that very moment, styling my hair for the day. I did as instructed and exhaled. All around me there was chaos, Sasha going over the dress for the last time before I put it on. Another hairdresser doing Jamie and Caroline's hair. The make up artists trying to do my make up and other random visitors floating in and out. My father was sitting quietly, keeping out of everyone's way. We were at my house, I had stayed there last night. Jared had stayed home. We had both been annoyed that I'd left, but everyone had insisted, it was traditional for the bride and groom to be apart. To top it off, my mother had refused to come to the house if Caroline was there, and I had refused to not have Caroline there. In the few months I'd known her, she'd shown me more affection than my mom ever had. She'd cried when I had told her and my dad, telling me she didn't mind staying away. But I wouldn't hear of it. So then my mom threatened not to come at all! She hadn't even come to the rehearsal lunch, her flights had been booked and she wasn't willing to change them. Quite honestly I was okay with it, she was aggravating to say the least. But right now I was anxious and Jared was the only one I wanted. I messaged him.
~ I miss you, I wish I could see you
~ I'll come over, fuck what they all said
~ No! It's fine, I'll be okay, I'm just having a moment of anxiety
~ The formal part will be over soon and then we can just be together and have fun
~ Yeah you're right of course
~ I can't wait to see you
~ Me too
~ Are you feeling okay?
Just this week my body had decided to start having moments of nausea. We weren't sure whether it was related to the pregnancy or just me being anxious. Either way it was annoying. Libby had been over this morning to give me a shot to stop it.
~ Yeah I'm fine
~ Do you want me to call you?
~ I think I'll be okay 
~ Okay, I'll see you soon baby
I put my phone down so they could finish my make up. It was time for the dress. I stood in the middle of the room and waited patiently while they slipped it on me. Champagne coloured tulle. Off the shoulder with long see through tulle sleeves, straight bust. Layers and layers of floaty cascading tulle for the skirt. Sasha had, last minute, added some extra free floating tulle around the waist. When I noticed, she had caught my eye in the mirror and nodded subtly. There was no way anyone would notice a thing. They secured the pewter crown and veil and helped me slip on my heels. Always high. I liked to look as tall as possible next to Jared. There was silence as I turned to face them all. Caroline looked like she was going to cry and so did Jamie and Darcy, they sniffed and dabbed at their eyes. Marcus clapped softly, "Genevieve you look absolutely dazzling, just stunning" he said admiringly. I smiled, "thank you" I said inclining my head. "Oh my goodness" said a voice, my dad had just walked in. He was smiling warmly. "My little girl" he said shaking his head. He came over and hugged me gently. "You look beautiful, he's very lucky to have you" he said. I bit my lip trying not to burst into tears. "The cars are here, let's move family" said Marcus, back to doing his job. It was a finely orchestrated set of maneuvers getting me into the black ghost Rolls Royce. The others piling into the other cars and we were on our way.
~ Are you waiting for me?
~ I sure am, you on your way?
~ Yes
~ God I can't wait!
~ Me too X
I had a thousand butterflies in my stomach. I was so nervous. My dad squeezed my hand, calming me down. Talking about silly things. How slow he would walk, all the slower so that Jared would have to wait longer. He hoped there was regular food, not just vegan. Was the cake vegan? I giggled at his rambling. The car pulled into the long driveway of the winery overlooking the ocean. The car stopped and we waited for Marcus and crew to come and help me out. "Genevieve, you know I'm always here for you. Will, always be here for you" he said earnestly, before the door opened. I was surprised at how serious he sounded. "Thanks dad, I know" I said. He nodded, looking like he wanted to say more, but I patted his hand. "I understand, it's fine. You've always been there" I said reassuringly, kissing his cheek. "Let's go dazzle them!" said Marcus throwing open the door.