Attachment Is Forbidden

1. Forbidden

OBI-WAN STARTLED AWAKE, scared out of his mind. His heart was racing as if he'd just been in a major battle, and he was in a cold sweat. Obi-Wan noticed he was shaking and took a few deep breaths, trying to calm himself. At least no one was here to see him without his defenses. 

"Obi-Wan?"

Shit. He'd forgotten that Anakin was there.

"I'm fine, Anakin," Obi-Wan said, but even to himself his voice sounded weak. 

"No, you're not," Anakin said. "You're shaking, you look terrified, and you woke up shouting. You are not fine. Not in the slightest."

"Fine, you caught me. It was another nightmare. About Qui-Gon's death," Obi-Wan admitted. 

"Another one?" Anakin groaned in sympathy.

"They've been getting worse, lately," Obi-Wan said, annoyed. "It sucks. I don't like them one bit, and I definitely don't want to keep having them, but I don't know how to make them stop. It's driving me crazy."

Obi-Wan stared around the room, still frantically trying to calm his racing heart. Deep breaths, Obi-Wan, he told himself. Deep breaths. His room was a mess -- there were papers all over the place, books stacked in a few places, and a whole shelf of holocrons on one wall. They were personal ones, of course -- the important Jedi Holocrons were stored in a sacred spot behind the Archive Library. He eyed the security camera in the corner that he kept turned off pretty much at all times, making sure it was still off. It was, thank the gods. If the Council ever found out...

Obi-Wan and Anakin had been together ever since the start of the Clone Wars. In secret, of course -- the Jedi Council could never know. If they found out, both Anakin and Obi-Wan would likely get kicked out of the Jedi Order. But Obi-Wan knew he was happy with Anakin, despite being a full fifteen years older than him, and if he could make Anakin equally as happy, well...Obi-Wan thought it was worth the risk.

They were a full three years out of the war, and peace ruled the galaxy -- finally. And yet Obi-Wan still had nightmares about the day sixteen years previously when his beloved master, Qui-Gon Jinn, had died at the hands of the Sith Lord Darth Maul. Now the Sith had been wiped from the galaxy, except possibly Maul, who, as far as the Order knew, was still on the loose. Ever since Anakin's epic betrayal of Palpatine, alias Darth Sidious, the Jedi had been able to keep the peace. After Palpatine's death by Anakin's own hand, the war had ended, as now the Seperatists had no leaders. Nute Gunray, Poggle the Lesser, and other powerful Seperatists had been tried and most executed or sentenced to life imprisonment on Coruscant, and the Republic had regained its footing. A year after the war ended, a certain Senator Padme Amidala had been elected Chancellor -- a bold move, considering her young age and the simple fact that she was a woman. The Republic had not had a female Chancellor in decades, but the vote was unanimous among the Senate. Padme had played her role well during the war, and Mace Windu, who had been standing in as a temporary Chancellor as the Republic mended itself due to his previous experiences with politics, had gladly stepped aside. 

The Jedi Code still existed, and after the initial roundup of rogue Sith and Seperatists, the Jedi had gone back to their basic way of life, though most of the older ones were now seasoned warriors. Anakin's apprentice, Ahsoka Tano, had come back into the Jedi Order only after the Clone Wars ended, though she had requested to be at her backstabbing best friend Bariss Offee's (second) trial, and then to be the one to carry out Bariss's sentence of execution. They had let her, if only because she looked so dangerous when she'd made the demand. Anakin had been overjoyed to have his apprentice and friend back, and Obi-Wan, too, had been quite happy to see Ahsoka. She was much like Anakin in spirit, and had always been lively to hang around, even in the darkest of battles. She'd completed her training with two new lightsabers that had slowly turned from red to white as she fought with them. Anakin had told Obi-Wan that Ahsoka had stolen Asajj Ventress's lightsabers from Bariss, who had stolen them in the first place, and used them to bring about the traitorious Jedi's demise, then kept them and somehow healed the crystals.

Obi-Wan was jolted out of his memories by Anakin's hand on his back. Obi-Wan hadn't realized he'd sat up. 

"You okay?" Anakin asked.

"Yes. Just remembering the aftermath of the Clone Wars," Obi-Wan sighed.

"Things are different now," Anakin said. "I know I never thought that I would end up living on Coruscant, as a Jedi Knight, hopefully on the way to being granted the rank of Master, with the most amazing lover a man could ask for..."

"Oh, stop it, you," Obi-Wan teased. 

"No," Anakin laughed. "I will not." 

And then Anakin forced Obi-Wan to look at him...and kissed him, kissed him so desperately and passionately that Obi-Wan forgot he was in the Jedi Temple, forgot that this was forbidden by the Code, forgot everything except the taste of Anakin's lips, the warm feel of his body against Obi-Wan's...

One of Obi-Wan's hands ended up buried in Anakin's hair, his other one resting on Anakin's chest as Anakin wrapped his arms around Obi-Wan, holding him close. Anakin's tongue searched Obi-Wan's teasingly before Obi-Wan returned the kiss, biting down gently on Anakin's lower lip. Anakin only proceeded to deepen the kiss even further, suffocating Obi-Wan. Not that he minded. This was Anakin he was with, after all.

Eventually they had to breathe, so reluctantly Anakin pulled back. 

"Feel better?" Anakin asked breathlessly.

"Much," Obi-Wan gasped. "You always seem to know how to cheer me up."

"I've only been sleeping with you since the Clone Wars began, Obi-Wan," Anakin said. "I think there's a reason."

"I love you," Obi-Wan sighed.

"Love you, too," Anakin said. "Let's just hope the Council never finds out."

Obi-Wan just snuggled in closer to Anakin, not willing to think about what the Council would say if they found out. He closed his eyes as Anakin kissed his head, relaxing into him, falling once more into sleep.

And this time dreaming only of Anakin.

-/-/-/-/-/

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~R.A. Starkiller