Hospital for souls -Kellic-

chapter 11

*i think this will have more than two more chapters so oops i lied,i feel like this is one of the darkest chapters i've writen, sorry*

*Vic Pov*

I take a breath as I look out the window

"stop being a fag" someone says to me as he throws a crummbled piece of paper at my head, i just keep looking out the window. "hey faggot" he adds "look at me" he says sternly and I slowly move my head to look at him, his eyes locked with mine.

"you remind me of someone" he says

"who?" I ask softly

"just some weird kid i used to know, you wouldnt know him, he went to anoher school anyways, but i used to beat him up, I'm gussing you would be a great punching bag, I know he was, he tried picking fights with me, faggot didnt realize I would always win" he says and I feel a shiver go down my spine. I dont even know this kids name but Im scared of him, I look away and hear the bell ring but I can still feel his eyes on me

"hey Ethan, we should go" Zack says. Whos Ethan?

"Why?" wait the kid whos going to hurt me is Ethan, his voice doesnt sound like an Ethan, I thought people named Ethan were nice.

"We dont want to be late, stop wasting your time on Fuentes, hes not worth it" Zack mumbles and they walk out of the room. I wait a few minutes and Then rush down the hall, trying to avoid everyone and anyone. I see my class room and before I can rush inside i feel something...someone pull me back, I try moving my legs but I go no where.

"when I suggested hurting you, you did realize I meant now, right?" Ethan says as he turns me to face him and he smirks at me. Before I can say something, his fist collides with my face and i start tasting, what taste like iron but is red. I never thought I'd taste my own blood before, surprisingly I'm enjoying this, it hurts, but like Zack said, im not worth it, and I clearly never will be.

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I open my eyes to realize I'm bloody and on the bathroom floor. All I remember is Ethan punching me in the jaw and slapping me, the slight feeling of him kicking me, being pushed roughly against the locker, somewhere in there I must have blacked out, because I dont remember coming in here. i push myself to sit up against the wall, i tilt my head back and close my eyes taking all the pain in. I look back down and tears start flowly and coming down my cheeks. I'm completely worthless. Cant stand up for myself. Cant be with his own boyfriend. My boyfriend doesnt want me. My Boyfriend is stuck in some old building, I didnt like it there at first because well I didnt want or need to be there, But now I dont like it for the same reason everyone else seems to hate it, Once you are there you get no escape, you get no freedom, you get no relief. Your constantly being checked.

You crave the feeling of the blade digging into your skin. You crave holding a knife. You crave pills you dont need. You crave the feeling of scratching your skin unil it goes red and you slowly feel pain. You crave the fact that death is an option, you crave the thought of being able to die. But your watched so you dont get any of that.

I've been living a lie. Life is beautiful? Bullshit, I cant believe I basically preatched that! I cant believe the thought of helping people by expressing that life is beautiful was somthing I was going to do. When in reality, I myself have had it bad without realizing it, no wonder why my mom sent me there, she knew I was going to get depressed sooner or later, I showed signs, I scared them.

It just took me too long to realize, Too long to realize I have no friends because no one wants to be my friend. the reason no one wanted to do projects with me, wasnt because I was really smart and they wanted to be the same by not letting me do the whole project, it was because I'm me.

I used to tell myself 'oh she thinks you are too smart which is why she isnt your partner' when the last person who doesnt have a partner would join a group of three. leaving me alone. Or I would think that about anyone when they wouldnt come look for me or come to be my partner.

I used to tell myself, 'no one wants to ask you to go to the movies because they think you already seen it'

I used to tell myself 'No one is going to ask you on a date because they think you already have a boyfriend'

I used to think on the positive side, thinking that was reality. But I was wrong. Reality isnt always positive. It took me too long to realize, and over all, I'm just wasting my time, and everyone elses.

I pull myself off the bathroom floor and i wash up all the dried blood I still have on me. I splash water on my face so I dont look like i just cried. I fix my hair so it doesnt look like someone pulled at it. I put on a fake smile in case i run into someone out there. I look at my arms and notice brusies. I sigh and i limp my way out of the bathroom, almost falling once I dont have the wall to hold on to. No one in sight. The bell should ring soon and I dont even know what class People are in, As far as I know, everyone could've left, but I know that isnt true because The School would still have sounds from the band room with people practicing.

i open my locker and take out my hoodie and slip it on, I took it off only because I was warm and I knew I wouldnt see mike any time soon. I pull the sleeves down and I lose the fake smile because no one is in sight, noone can see me. I take my stuff out of my locker and i pull my phone out of my back pocket, not surprised to see the screen has a crack in it, a few cracks. I turn it on, and i see the time, School should end in five minutes. I know one thing for sure, I am surprised my phone still works, but yet, who would I talk to? My phone is useless. Just like Me.